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Broke up with by bf of 3 years who cheated on me and now I dont think I was in love with him. I know girls who forgived their bfs and I might be overthinking this but if I really in love with him wouldnt I try everything to make it work and atleast give him a second chance?
| Yes | 13 | |
| No | 19 | |
| Other | 4 |
Eh. In my opinion, love is when you're in a perfect harmony of things. However, your BF was a douche, and cheated. Other women, once again in my opinion, were more forgiving because they were one of two things; latched on to their BF, or desperate. It sounds to me like you did really like him, just not patient enough to deal with him. And I do know cheating is a very sensitive matter, although it can be worked out, thus me saying patience. Tons of chicks are like you, who can't decide. Just do yourself a favor, go get laid one last time, and close yourself for awhile... But! If you see a dude you like, be analytical. Don't stalk him, just become friends, hang out, and he makes the move first, use logic. Hoped this helped. Btw, English is not my first language.
Maybe you were in love before, but over time and after BS you've experienced burn out. It's ok to not feel anything. Be glad you don't have to deal with heartbreak this time around, and have fun finding new partner(s)!
Dumping a cheater is the right thing to do, end of story! Don't second guess yourself, you did the right thing. God bless yourself for being a smart cookie. You're one of a kind, so don't compare yourself to others.
;-)
I don't know if you can look at your own actions to figure out your feelings. "I did/didn't do x, therefore I must feel y, {which justifies doing x in the first place}".
Dubious line of thinking.
But at the same time, you broke up with him and it seems like you don't want to give him a second chance. So, it just seems like you're doing what you want to do.
The idea of being "in love" or not "in love" isn't as black/white as we're led to believe, imo. There's a whole range of feelings and choices.
Anyway, take Rainbowbash's advice!
The answer is yes. Letting somebody go when they have betrayed or trust in an unforgivable manner is a sign of mental stability. Not letting go shows obsession and desperation, which are different from love.
Well, I respect women who do that, tho I feel forgiveness is something that makes a person strong as well. I have had a similar experience and I chose to forgive not cause I'm crazy or desperate lol I did not go looking for a relationship with him either! I really appreciated him and his character and I realised that this was his only mistake. However I wasn't with him as long as your relationship lasted. I do believe if you would just keep hanging his cheating lika noose around his neck it's best to quit the relationship. Not all couples can survive this :/