Ask Your Question today
Do you hold grudges? If you do, for what kind of insult or injury? If you don't, why not?
Do you agree that resentment is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die?
| I forgive and forget | 5 | |
| I forgive and I don't forget | 18 | |
| I don't forgive and I don't forget | 9 | |
| I don't forgive but I forget | 6 |
It takes a lot for me to condemn someone in the first place, but if I do I don't forgive them often. If someone does a bad thing, time doesn't make that any more or less a reflection of their personality. Time might make the consequences of their actions go away, but focusing on the consequences is short-sighted and reflexive. Just because the consequences have ended doesn't mean they're a good person. I'm not saying leopards can't change their spots; I strongly believe that people change. I just won't assume people have changed just because it's been a long time :P
Every emotion can be channeled positively, and resent is not an exception.
I don't usually hold things against people unless they do it on multiple occasions. At which point they go on my list of people to never talk to and avoid at all costs.
A serious transgression requires a serious response, but never without regard for the consequences. For instance, beating up the guy who seduced your girlfriend might feel good for a few minutes, but the years in jail for assault will probably not seem so good.
Never, ever scar someone's face, as every time they look in the mirror, they will be thinking of you and their response to your actions, even if they instigated the situation in the first place.
A blind fury will certainly do you much more damage than your adversary, in the long run, but a cold, calculated response can be immensely rewarding and satisfying.
"You wouldn't like me if I was angry"; -the hulk.