Am i overreacting?

27% Normal
16 Comments

Well I am a 20 year old woman, I work in a testosterone filled environment. Egotistical men every where. I've only been at this job two months, and already thinking about quitting. My problem is dealing with the men i work with who are in there 40's. One in particular says and does things that make me really uncomfortable, like telling me " I'm doable" and pinching under my arm where my bra is. Making jokes about me having other men I work with babies, and that gets all the other men going and joking. He says very vulgar and sexually charged things in front of me to get me to blush, no matter how hard I try I can't help but blush. The part that makes me angry is that he has a daughter my age, i wonder how he would feel if an older man treated his daughter like this. I present myself in a professional manner, i have been told they are doing certain things because i am a quiet girl.I find no humor in any of this, and to make matters worse my boss defended him and told me I was uptight. Am i over reacting when I say it makes me uncomfortable?

Voting Results
27% Normal
Based on 95 votes (26 yes)
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Comments ( 16 )
  • [Old Memory]
    14 years ago

    No you are not. It sounds like sexual harassment. Pinching where your bra is? That is way over the top. Document. Perhaps talk to your boss's boss. Consider a lawyer or legal clinic.

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  • girl.nxt.dr_1985
    14 years ago

    Well you may just have to "stir the pot" a little bit. If it's offensive to you and everyone else who's commenting on your situation, it'll be offensive in court too. You're not uptight. You have NORMAL female boundaries. Maybe tell them this is a work place, not a bar. You're a co-worker, not a stripper. I agree with those who posted before me: it's sexual harrasment. Please be careful; if they are violating your space to such a degree as to publicly pinch you or touch you, who knows what they are capable of when it's not public.

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  • 13thpipeline
    14 years ago

    I'm a guy and I say you are defiantly not overreacting! I'd file for sexual harassment, or get another job. Regardless of your gender you should be treated with respect. These guys obviously have absolutely no respect for you. I mean seriously! Even guys don't do that to each other(unless their gay rapists or something)!

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  • Goosey2
    13 years ago

    You are NOT overreacting! This is not ok. You should not have to feel uncomfortable in your place of work.

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  • Layla32
    13 years ago

    I would report them!Even your boss.

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  • joemommamia
    13 years ago

    Document document document - you got a gold mine there! If the boss is not on your side - document some more - if you are still in the same situation in another two months go see a lawyer and let them find out what they are doing is way off base from the lawyer - be prepared to get fired for something stupid but your state dept of labor can help with that. Good luck.

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  • dwe
    14 years ago

    SEXUAL HARASSMENT WITHOUT A DOUBT.

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  • Brooser
    14 years ago

    Yeah, totally sexual harassment. You should report it to a superior, and try to make it clear to this guy that it's not okay for him to talk to/touch you that way. The next time he goes to pinch you, slap his hand away.

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  • sissylala
    14 years ago

    You need to give him a warning that what he is doing is making you uncomfortable and you want him to stop immediately. If he does it again, if you have an HR dept. tell them, if not tell your boss.

    What he is doing is illegal and creating a hostile work environment. Saying you are "doable" and attempting to make you blush by embarrassing you is sexual harassment.

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  • [Old Memory]
    14 years ago

    Two Words: Sexual Harrassment!

    Look, nothing wrong with some office fun and jokes, nothing even Wrong with sexual inuendo...if ya are comfortable wit hthat sort of thing.

    But this guy Pinches you?

    Touches you?

    NOT GOOD!

    Your body is a temple, ransacking not allowed except by invitation, and you don't have to take it.

    Report the bastard!

    OMB

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  • one_green
    14 years ago

    Agree totally with previous poster. This is why we have sexual harrassment laws. You need to go to your boss and report it and if he tries to intimidate you in doing nothing, go to that person's boss. Tell them you want to file a sexual harrassment report. Then go through with it. If you don't report this man he will think it is okay to continue it and not only with you, but with other females. Don't be nervous. They can't fire you for this. If they do, you can do to the Labor Relations Board in your state and file a complaint and sue. Stick up for yourself!

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    • SunnyNoel
      14 years ago

      My mother also works for this company,that's why I haven't said more. I do not want to go over my boss's head and talk to his boss, because my mother also works for this company and I don't want to cause her problems. I'm afraid to stir the pot so to speak. I have been thinking about just quitting and never looking back, but I'm afraid to quit, since my mother has showed her distaste for that idea. She doesn't want me to upset her boss and make her look bad by quitting a long term career after two months when she went out of her way to recommend me.

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  • regisphilbin
    8 years ago

    definitely not okay

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  • Nokiot9
    9 years ago

    Report that shit. You could end up with a nice new company car

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    Sexual Harrassment for sure.

    Sue and you will own him and the company

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  • Jen118584
    14 years ago

    I agree, stick up for yourself and report it. Are they a member of the Better Business Bureau? Start documenting and building a case and call them. OR...take this guy aside and let him know how you feel. Maybe he thinks you like it. Which I know still doesn't excuse it but pinning him with a sexual harassment case could ruin his career forever. I know he's probably a jerk, but it might be easier and better for everyone if you just tell him, Look, you're being inappropriate and it needs to stop or I'll be forced to take action. If he still doesn't stop, then f**k him, sue his ass.

    Personally I think the OCCASIONAL, harmless sexual harassment at work makes it more fun, but I understand that many women don't feel the same, and if he's getting all the other men involved, I can see how that would make you uncomfortable.

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