Am i obsessed with my partner?

59% Normal
7 Comments

My partner and I have been together for nearly 2 years (this july) I was in a previous relationship when we first got together, which ended out quite naturally afterwards...horribly convinient i felt!
I feel sick when I see my partner with female friends, I'm so sure he finds them attractive, yet we still make love and its beautiful, and I shouldn't be so insecure, but I am!!! I know were in a strong relationship, but I find it hard not to get him to be with me in the evenings, just going to bed and talking etc., he just wants to zone out in his room every night now and I feel so worried. He suffered from a cybersex problem when we first got together, I always knew he was a bit of a flirt, but that problem came into our relationship more than once. I love him, but Im almost waiting for something, like for him to slip up. I don't want to feel like this, I truly love him and don't know what to do.
I feel like parent and thats really bad. I shouldn't 'watch over him' I want to feel okay with him being alone and not to feel that something will happen to make him change his mind with me. Help!! Is this normal??

Voting Results
59% Normal
Based on 34 votes (20 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 7 )
  • DarkAngel212
    12 years ago

    If you dont trust someone they are more likely to cheat on you. If you are waiting for him to slip up he is probably subconsciously picking up on that which makes him insecure and therefore more likely to cheat in order to get reassurance from somebody. He may be zoning out because he needs some space or time to himself but doesn't want to make you feel bad so he wont say it. There is a chance he could be cheating or being unfaithful; and the flirting issue is worrying but for the most part I have found guys aren't as bad as most girls think.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
  • ccjigsaw
    12 years ago

    He's given you reason not to trust him, that's why you feel uneasy. Relationships like this are doomed to fail. I had a similar problem with my ex, and I felt like I had to watch him allt he time. Good luck though, in what ever choice you make

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • frazzled
    12 years ago

    My husband did the same thing, watched porn and i saw it in the history and I fought with him that day. But seems like he keeps doing it pretty often. Weird thing is I started watching porn when i knew he was doing this. He is cool about this.When we trust someone and they break our trust i don't know how you can rebuild it. I find it hard. I know he is true to me but i cant trust. All I can say is talk to him openly let him know that you trust him and are giving his space. When men feel they are watched upon they act weird.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • chatter289
    12 years ago

    Me and my bf had the same problem, with regards ti cyber sex that is. I found out a nearly 10 months into the relationship that he was doing 'stuff' online with other women and it ended quite bad but things changed. But now, i do from time to time think as to whether he still does it and it makes me feel uncomfortable. I mean, i wouldnt mind him looking throuhg ponr while im there or other site, but the thought of him doing it 'behind' me makes me feel like, we are not really 'open'. I know we all need our alone time, but with regards to intimacy? i dont think so.
    I say talk to you him hun, im actually going to write my bf an email about how i still feel from time to time with regards to his cyber things, even though we have been together for 2 and ahalf years.

    good luck x

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • Gir_loves_cupcakes
    12 years ago

    It is normal to feel this way but it's not right. Relationships are supposed to be built on trust and it seems like yalls started out with the cyber sex problems and flirting which explains your jealousy and trust issues I'd say either dump him if you find u can't trust him but if you really like him talk to him about this issue make sure you give him space though and work on your self esteem

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    2 years and you already have these feelings, sounds to me like it will be a problem that will continue to grow. The cybersex problem was kinda funny as well. Sorry about laughing.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • miadapaz
    12 years ago

    Considering you say he never has the time for you and prefers to 'zone out' maybe you are still together out of familarity and the secure feeling of a relationship. It is possible to love someone yet no longer be IN love with them. You care about them and want the best for them, but if your needs are being met then its time to think about yourself. If he is unwilling to communicate with you will you be still feeling this way in another 2 years? 10 years? 20 years? I think you should organise to get out of the house, away from distractions and have a real conversation with him and explain your feelings.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0