Am i normal for a 20 year old?

60% Normal
4 Comments

I'm a 20 year old girl and I live with my mum and little brother, my parents split up about 6/7 years ago, my dad lives about 5 minutes away from me. I'm a really introverted and withdrawn person, I struggle socially and always have my whole life I can't even have a basic conversation that lasts more than 30 seconds with anyone outside my immediate family, they're the only people I feel comfortable around. I have a job so I work full time but I don't have any friends or a boyfriend or anything, I've never kissed anyone or had sex. I'm not sure why but ever since I was about 16 I've found myself not wanting to have any friends and being happy that way. Most other people my age spend evenings at friends houses and weekends out at nightclubs or out socialising, I spend all of my free time with my mum or sat alone in my room online. My mum is my favourite person in the world (don't think she knows I think that) and I like to spend as much time with her as possible, she has a boyfriend so on weekends we usually do stuff like to out to the shops with them or we go for walks with the dog. I don't think they mind me spending so much time with them but sometimes I feel like I'm just there in the way being annoying? I've had other people (work colleagues etc.) ask me if I'm planning to move out soon and I always just lie and say maybe but I can't afford to right now, truth is I never want to move out of my mums house, the thought of it makes me cry because I just want to stay with her forever, and then that makes me think of when she'll get old and then pass away and I get so depressed I can't handle it. I worry that I'll end up killing myself when that happens. Anyway is any of this normal for someone my age? I just feel like my brain is wired completely differently to other people's. If anyone can relate to any of this please let me know would be interested to hear about your stories.

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60% Normal
Based on 47 votes (28 yes)
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Comments ( 4 )
  • DADNSCAL
    8 years ago

    I see several things in your post. First of all you may be codependent on your mother, which is understandable given your situation. Secondly, you may be slightly autistic, since you say you can't hold a conversation and have no relationships. You also sound like you're not in control of your emotions. I think you should ask your family doctor for a referral to a therapist, who can help you with your struggle. Good luck

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  • yu-gi-ohChampion25
    8 years ago

    i was like this when i was little before i realised i was just getting manipulated by someone selfish and mentally ill. don't become attached to what your parents think, chances are really good theyre exaggerating their emotions to guilt you and control you. find someone else to get attached to because you'll be crying your eyes out when your 30 years old sitting around hearing her bitch and complain with no life or future.

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  • mysistersshadow
    8 years ago

    I can't really offer anything helpful I have a certain social awkwardness but I'm really good at covering it all in all what you describe is not normal but I couldn't begin to tell you what you could do about it Sorry.

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  • Grotgirl
    8 years ago

    If you're happy not having friends then I see no problem. Just because it's going against the grain doesn't make it right or wrong. If it makes you feel good, and you're not hurting people, theres really no harm in doing something that makes you happy. And if being in solitude makes you tick then fuck what people think. Also, stop making excuses to your colleagues, and definitely talk to somebody about the way you feel about your Mother. It's normal to feel sad when you think of a loved one passing. But your mother being the centre of your universe? And thinking that you'll commit suicide when she dies? Not normal. Seek help.

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