"starting over again" feels like subtle torture

72% Normal
3 Comments

is it supposed to be this hard to start over? i moved from a town i'd been living in for a long time and traveled for a while and have now relocated in my hometown after years of being gone. i'm unmarried and have no children, though i'm at the prime age to be starting these kinds of things. i don't make friends quickly. i miss the old friends i had, but i felt a great need to travel when i moved away from them, and most of them were in their 20's (a few years younger than me at least), so of course their lives weren't settled yet and they are moving around too. i just turned 30, and i almost feel traumatized by losing so many people in the last few years due to our changes of geography. for some reason, i connect best with people in person and i keep in touch with those i was closest to (minus a few people), but i don't have the closeness that i once knew. save for three or so people who don't live near me right now, i don't feel known by anyone, and i don't know anyone right now. i almost feel too old to start over again, even if this is kind of the choice i made a couple of years ago--to try something new. after a certain age, does "starting over again" just start to feel like a subtle form of torture, especially if you're an introvert?

Voting Results
72% Normal
Based on 18 votes (13 yes)
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Comments ( 3 )
  • 8Serene8
    13 years ago

    Well that's what happens when you decide to do something that takes you away from everything you know and are used to.

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  • dappled
    13 years ago

    I moved away for four years and largely lost contact with people. When I came back, everything was different. It sounds naive to say it now, but I expected the life I left behind to continue somehow, so that I could jump right back in. Needless to say, it's nothing like that and the act of me going away was like a little death for it. Had I stayed, I'd still have been integrated and wouldn't have noticed how everything had changed.

    I don't have any answer for you because you have already undertaken this, as had I. But I will say that I understand and that you will become reintegrated in time (even if it's not as quick as you'd hope for).

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  • kricket
    13 years ago

    I envy people that could afford to travel. You have the rest of your life to develop new friendships.

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