please leave some advice.

3 Comments

PLEASE DON'T VOTE IF YOU HAVEN'T READ.

My ex boyfriend and I got back together after almost 8 months of just being friends. We didn't date for very long before this, only about 2 months, but we both felt very strongly for each other. Our families just didn't like us. Early December he broke up with me, and I've been a living mess ever since (so has he, sorta). We both gained at least 20 pounds, and our families kicked us out at around the same time in January. We decided in February it would be a good idea to become friends again. We met each other again at a pink triangle support group and we saw each other for an hour and a half every Tuesday. This is still going on. In about April things were getting really bad for me. I was really, REALLY depressed and I lost my job because I couldn't even get myself out of bed. I was suicidal, and the only thing that stopped me was the fact I had him to live for. That he was my friend. How would he feel if I died? On June 24th (2 days ago) we went to this concert together. It ended at 11 am, so we decided it would be a good idea that he stayed at my place for the night (currently renting my friend's basement). That night was amazing. After the high of seeing my favorite band play for FREE, and going home with my crush, I was so happy. We were in my bed talking about how we hated losing each other because the satisfaction of kissing and cuddling was gone. Before we were going to go to bed (at about 2 am) I asked if talking about that stuff was kind of signaling that he wanted to do that stuff with me. He said yes, and I agreed it would be fun.
After a furious make-out session, we talked about how much we missed each other again, and how we felt when we were around each other. We decided to start dating. The next day his friends invited me to a potluck at the beach. I made some cookies and we went. It was so fucking awkward. I have never felt so uncomfortable around him before. We couldn't talk or hold hand because it was so weird. I forgot to mention, that morning before we went, we kind of had sex. So you can imagine why it was a little weird. Around the time my friend was coming to pick us up, I broke down. I was having a panic attack, and I told him I was feeling suicidal. It was like he didn't even care. He just said "oh... no" and every time I said something to do with the fact I felt this way he said "oh, i feel that."
I'm really fucking confused. Please give me some advice.

This sounds like it's going to get super toxic. Break-up. 3
Stay together, it's only been 48 hours. At least try! 1
You are not in the right shape to be in a relationship. Break-up. 2
You need a relationship to keep you going. Stay together. 0
Stay together, I'll put some advice in the comments. 0
Break-up. I'll put some advice in the comments. 0
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Comments ( 3 )
  • riffraffy
    7 years ago

    Don't try to get into a serious relationship when you are unable to love yourself. It will only make you both miserable.

    Here's my usual line for depression advice: think of all the things you consume and then think of all the things you create. The latter is what builds your self esteem and feeling of self worth. Improve yourself a little each day and you'll love yourself for it.

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  • mysistersshadow
    7 years ago

    Move on and get some self esteem before getting into another relationship.

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  • Blackhawk6969
    7 years ago

    You need to learn to love yourself before you can learn to love someone else. I don't see an age in your story, but either way, you ARE important to somebody. Somebody that you may not be aware of as of yet, but somebody does love you. I know it's hard breaking up with somebody you think you are in love with. It is really tough, I have been there, a few times. When I was in the sixth grade a girl broke up with me to go with a guy that supposedly looked just like me????? Anyway, jump forward 6 years and as seniors we are dating again. Just as in the sixth grade, poof, left me for the same guy again. Was I devastated? Hell yeah, miserable, you bet. But I didn't give up. No I didn't end up marrying her. I moved out to the west coast for a while and married a girl out there. She left me, when her ex got out of prison. We have a son together, whom I haven't seen in over 25 years. Not that I didn't want to, she moved away and nobody would tell me where they moved to. I still sent child support to the state of Oregon until they finally write me a letter telling me that his new "father" had adopted him. I moved back to the East coast, not long after they left,and we eventually got divorced. I am now married to the best woman in the world with 2 wonderful children and a beautiful almost 2 year old granddaughter. I have had tough times. I had an anuyreism that ruptured in my brain back in 2004 and I am supposed to be dead, the doctors do not know why I am still alive today, but here I am. There are days where I hurt so bad that I think drilling a hole in the side if my head will alleviate some of the pain and make the noise ringing in my head go away, but that would also finish me off and I would not get to see my babies again, so that IS NOT a choice I want to make. As I said, learn to love yourself, and then try to love someone else. It may take a few, but the right one will come along and you will be happier than you can ever believe you can be. I know I am. Good Luck, and while you are at it, SMILE!!

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