"is it nomal that i feel like courtesy is one-sided?"

56% Normal
2 Comments

I've started dating once I turned 18, less problems, and I've saved up enough money so that my dates will get the works of a date. I was shy in my high school years so now that I'm older and moved out of my hometown, I wanted to mature and get out more. At the beginning, just asking a girl out is a trial for me. Getting the nerve to stop and make a fool of myself in front of her... Anyway, I asked a nice girl out from my school. Dinner, movie, dessert. Classic.

I drop her off at her house and she said she had a good time... Then closes the door. I know I should've expected anything more, it was the first date. But before we even went out on the date, I gave her my number to call me. She didn't call back for a few weeks. I called her back to schedule another date, but she said she wasn't interested.

I moved on, slowly, and after a few months I was actually asked on a date! I'm no Denzel T~T, but she asked me and said I was cute. Which was a first for me and I probably said yes too quickly. Screaming a yes at her probably wasn't wise, might've scared her a little... Again, the same drill. At the drop-off she closed the door again, saying she would call. As desperate as I was, I waited by the phone whenever I could. She called and said she just wanted to be friends. Sure, I was happy for getting a new friend but it was still awkward she worked with me everyday.

Whatever savings I had went back to my normal income. I'm trying not to give up on dating, but I'm kind of defeated at this point.

Now I'm not saying that I'm kind of mad that I payed for everything and didn't even get a peck on the cheek, it's probably just my bad luck. But why is it so hard? I'm going to keep going date after date until I either lose all my savings or I find the "one". >_>

Is it normal that I think that courtesy is one-sided.

Voting Results
56% Normal
Based on 18 votes (10 yes)
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Comments ( 2 )
  • Captain_Kegstand
    11 years ago

    Pretty much, TerryVie has it covered. Dating is a long drawn out game that takes TONS of practice to get good at. You can't give up after two girls! I've seen guys get shut down by more than that in the span of an hour and still get a girls number!

    Its a trial and error thing, just remember, when asking a girl out the worst possible thing that can happen is to get a "no". Doesn't seem that bad to me! Enjoy yourself on dates, don't be nervous, and don't ever give up on yourself. That would be silly!

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  • TerryVie
    11 years ago

    I'll not write too much here, but let me assure you, if i was interested in a person that i casually knew a while, i'd also greatly enjoy home-cooking and a movie on the couch. It doesn't have to be "formal" dates(dinner, movie, backseat) all the way.

    Also, evaluate how you act or what you talk about during those dates.
    If you have a female friend(or even that workmate, if you are friends), ask them to "coach" you.

    Before they learn to "lie" properly, many guys are either too honest about the wrong things, or lie too shamelessly on the right ones.
    Knowing what things to not mentioned/dodge, what things to be honest about and where you can playfully boast a little(in a joke way, not a lying way) is half the rent.

    Having a "coaching date" in which she tells you directly whats wrong or where you fail and CAN tell you because she's not hurting your feelings could really help you on that.

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