"i'm taking this glass...."

29% Normal
15 Comments

I went to Chili's one day and as is my usual habit, I take things from restaurants like the salt and pepper shakers, knives, etc. Usually what I take fits conveniently into the takeout boxes they provide so there's no need for formalities, I simply take what I want and no one is the wiser.

Well Chili's had this tall beer glass that I had to have. It wouldn't fit into a box obviously and I had no other means of smuggling it out, no baggy clothing, no shopping bags, and I didn't think it wise or practical to "suitcase" it (stick it up my ass).

I had a plan. I will wave my hand in front of the employees' faces like a flamboyant gay magician and say "I'm taking this glass out that door and *you're* not going to do anything about it."

It worked.

IIN?

Voting Results
29% Normal
Based on 45 votes (13 yes)
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Comments ( 15 )
  • suckonthis9
    11 years ago

    You have just admitted to several felony offenses.
    The FBI should be knocking on your door shortly.
    My advice: You should murder in cold blood the FBI agents as soon as they arrive. Otherwise you're going to prison for felony theft.

    Note to FBI: The above comment is satirical in nature. There is no need to investigate me.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      I'll barricade my doors with an impenetrable wall of pilfered salt shakers reinforced with papier mache made of 10,000 swindled napkins.

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    • ZoZo_ZiZi
      11 years ago

      one of the funniest comments I read this minute :D

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  • cigs
    11 years ago

    its normal as can be.

    i do the same thing but with food and only at this Asian restaurant they said i couldn't take my food home so i got a load of napkins to wrap my crab legs in and shoved them in my pocket so now when i go to these kind of places i wear pants with deep pockets so i can load up and leave. them frog legs are nasty and oily.

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  • Failedcasanova
    11 years ago

    Rather than wave your hand gay-like wave it in a Jedi mind trick kind of way. Much better results.

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  • Argadoh
    11 years ago

    It's not normal. But its fantastic you did it. xD

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  • Avant-Garde
    11 years ago

    O_0 No, that's stealing.

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  • tori
    11 years ago

    Is that why my favorite dinner went up in price?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      No, that's because Chili's is run by some greedy bastard.

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  • Justsomejerk
    11 years ago

    Nobody likes a thief.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      Chili's is the real thief here, with their overpriced gruel.

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      • iin2want2know
        11 years ago

        You speak the truth.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    Sounds like a great way to get your ass kicked. Just saying!

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      "*you're* not going to kick anyone's ass"

      (waving hands all gay-like)

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      • Avant-Garde
        11 years ago

        You've sure got some sassitude, don't you?

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