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Is it weird for my 31 yr old Bf to hang out and party with me I am 18 and my college friends who are all under 21??
hell no. ha ha what a creeper. i remember we used to have this guy come to our parties mainly to buy beer. and all the girls would come up to him and ask who's dad is he. i bet ur bf gets the same question. well atleast you got someone to buy you beer. ha ha i used to call that old man "dad" cuz he's so fuckin old. ha ha 31 - 18 = 13. ha ha he was a teenager when you were born. when you were finally learned to shit in a toilet he was old enough to drive. when you entered kindergarten he was your age. i can go on. but how gross just letting you know.
it's gross my uncle is 50 and he's dating a girl my age which is 19. my uncle and my mom are twins sooo it's like my mom going for one my friends for example. grotesque.
who cares...it's not that much of an age gap anyways. perhaps a maturity gap (i can't tell from your post which side is more immature, though). i know couples with twenty or thirty year age differences that have been married for the long haul and nothing catastrophic happened to them, and that was marriage. this is just a boyfriend who is conveniently old enough to buy you some beer and if you someday don't like him any more, as least you can look back on your life when you are his age and say to yourself that you had the experience of being with an adult while you were leaving your teens. and so he parties with your friends? i kind of understand the angle you are coming from, but at least he's not one of those older guys who abusively isolates you from your peers. that's even creepier. also, if you guys really have something that feels like it is genuinely working out--shouldn't he act like a boyfriend your age? or should he instead say to you 'oh no, honey...i can't go out tonight with you and your friends because when i was learning to drive you were learning to shit in a toilet." i'm not an older guy advocating this. i'm a female who just turned thirty...never dated a teenager since i was a teenager, but i can't see how what he is doing is just the craziest thing ever. the bottom line is that you are hopefully able discern your truest feelings for this guy, and if he's not a controling douche bag, then you probably have the upper hand in this situation (especially because you are young and he probably feels very lucky to be with a younger woman).
Women over 30 have already become 'clingers' they only have marriage and commitment on their minds. Given the option of a young partygoer who likes simple fun without ties or a tired 30something looking for permanency, the choice is easy.
Your 31 year old is a lucky guy.
It's weird for your 31 year old bf to be dating you at 18. But now that he's dating he probably can't bring you around his 30 something friends because you won't fit in there and his friends will be uncomfortable with the situation so he does not hang out with you when he is hanging out with friends his age. So probably the only time he can hang out with you comfortably in a social environment is with people your age.
well, maybe he parties with them because you party with them, or maybe in 20 years, he will still want to party with them.
13 years is a big stretch in age difference when you're only 18.
he isn't acting his age, that's for sure. what does he have in common with these people besides you?
sierra makes very valid points.
I believe there are certain stages in life in order to be a happy, fulfilled adult. You are 18 so you are just starting to enjoy freedom and the world around you in a "grown up" setting. Believe it or not things change quickly at this time and you go through a lot of transitions. This is where you really get to start learning who you are, what you want, and what path you will take with your life. It is a great time to party and explore and travel and be spontaneous.
Now your 31 yr old bf... He SHOULD be in a completely different phase of his life. Something is wrong here. I am not saying that 31 yr olds don't like to party or hang out with friends, but they should be doing it with people their age, who are going through the same type of life challenges. People in there 30's are usually ready to settle down, start a family- really kick off their career... It sounds like your bf is stuck in his 20's and not adjusting well. You need to ask yourself- when you get in your 30's would you want to be hanging out with a bunch of people under 21?
I have seen a couple of adults who do this- and if you think he is going to change and stop hanging out with people in this age group and partying... you would be wrong. They usually act this way for forever, never growing up and never becoming the responsible adult they should be.