What are your thoughts on sugardaddy/mamma and sugarbaby relationships?

A sugardaddy/mamma is a person who gives money/gifts to someone (usually someone much younger) in exchange for a relationship. I'm not sure why anyone would do this, but I'm wondering, what are *your* thoughts?

Is It Normal?
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  • There are 4 prior comments to mine (RoseIsabella, Mafioso, NormalJudge64, SwickDinging) - and I agree with all of them because I know a lot more about these sites than most people.

    I believe that my goal in life is to assist other people to do better, and I like assisting ladies too. I mentor couples and men as well on how to resolve issues and become more successful. I've been doing that for decades.

    When the Sugar Daddy sites first became popular I researched them and found that a lot of the ladies on them were just really looking for a way to do better; and had the idea that I could register as a "mentor only" sugar daddy and could assist some of them to do better in life; and without any expectation of romance or sex. That worked (once I learned a few lessons about these sites). Note that my wife is fully aware of this, and assisted me in writing my profile and chose the pictures I should post.

    So in fact I have been and currently still am registered as mentor only sugar daddy for my local area for over 7 years (might be approaching 8). I've been on several sites; and might change to a different site in the future.

    I have talked to likely 2000+ "sugar baby" ladies on the phone, and have sat down in person with at least 400 of them at least once. I know that I have assisted about 100 of them to improve their life or situation as we met more than once, including assisting 3 to start their own business (and assisting at least 10 others to improve their existing business). I will admit that there was one lady where a romantic relationship started to develop after several months (my wife knew and had met her); but, that did not work out in the end (and if I wanted sex and didn't care about my relationship and agreements with my wife I could easily have had at least 3 different woman a week: At least 3/4 of all the ladies I have met have told me that I was a really decent guy and that they would sleep with me).

    There are in fact a number of different groups of Ladies, and Men, on these sites with different goals.

    A lot of Ladies are on these sites primarily as they need money - and that is one way they can get it. There are 2 general subgroups: 1) Those that figure providing companionship and sex is the easiest thing they can do for the money they can earn. 2) Those that see no other way to earn the money they need for themselves and their family - and would drop it if they had another source of income.

    I don't criticize or judge them, and its the 2nd group that I usually end up working with. I've mentored a number of them where they do have another "conventional" SD for $ (which almost always does involve sex); and me for mentorship to improve their situation and income often with casual fun dates.

    I generally personally view the 2nd situations as overall abusive, and degrading for the Lady involved. A simple fact is that the reason so many men are Sugar Daddies is that its often cheaper and more steady than hiring normal "escorts" or prostitutes. The men using the Sugar Dady sites for this essentially treat them as such.

    For the 1st group: It's their life - and they are doing what they chose to do. I might point out that what they are doing works while they are in their age group... and its likely that their income will decline substantially when they get somewhat older; and perhaps they would like to learn knowledge and skills so they could earn money by other means.

    The next largest group of Ladies are looking for fun dates where the man will spend some money on them (and perhaps something more may come from it); and there are men looking for a fun date and don't mind spending some money on it (and perhaps something more will come from it). I personally view that as a balanced relationship with no real harm as long as they are both decent people.

    There is actually another group looking for really long term romantic and life partners, with the intention to marry. I don't see anything wrong with that either.

    Of course there are the scammers and dishonest people. One problem with the lowest quality (no charge to join) sites is that I've talked to a number of Ladies who have been raped from these sites: and they don't want to report it because that would mean their friends and family would know that they were on a Sugar Daddy site.

    In all my much longer time on Dating Sites (and far more telephone conversations - but less meets) I never met a Lady who told me that they were raped by their date. I'm sure it occurs; but it obviously occurs much more often on the Sugar Daddy sites as I'm sure that certain men have figured out how to identify those that are ashamed they are a sugar baby and not likely to report it.

    There are of course a handful of exceptions who are there for other reasons (I am one of those: and get messages that I'm obviously on the wrong site from some ladies looking for $$$). I've talked with and met some of the other "oddball" men and ladies on the two sites I've been on.

    Key is that there are some very distinct groups on these sites; and I view some as abusive, and some as balanced with nor harm. I'm one of the oddballs that does not meet any of the standard groups. I'm not there for a romantic relationship, sex, or just to give $$$ away to make me feel good. I can run for months where someone tells me "Thank you - you've really changed my life" (although they may use other words, and the look on their face tells far more). They usually move on after that; and most people are looking for small minor improvements in their lives. I'm still waiting for the one that has a really big dream from those sites.

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    • I forgot to mention that there is a sub-group of Ladies who are looking for money, and are looking for people who will provide it just because they are hard up. Some of these stories are legitimate. However, a lot of scammers pose as this.

      I know that because if I am going to assist someone I tend to buy the service or item they are requesting, and not give them cash. I've offered many a time to fix someone's car (even called their specified repair shop and set up so they could get a brake job, tires, etc. on me): 1) They never showed up with their car for the repairs; and 2) they call me all kind of "not so nice" names.

      My current assistance rules are that they have to be regularly meeting with me and working on improving themselves first to even be considered (and its fairly rare at that as I've found that in general the people who make the most improvement only need educational materials and training - not $$$). I will pay for a monthly bus pass or other trans, and even buy them basic groceries for a week or so to see if they are willing to improve themselves (and only continued for those willing to work on themselves). 80%+ of those I never see again - which tells me that they were mainly after $$$.

      Edited to add: This sub group is not interested in providing sex - or even the possibility: They just want people to give them money. My experience is most are scammers.

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  • Sounds awful to me, but I think that as long as both parties know what they are getting into and are happy to proceed, then it's up to them what they do. As long as there isn't any abuse I don't see how it would be anyone else's business.

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  • I don't think it's normal, or healthy to be on either end of this sort of agreement. It's not something I would ever want to do. I think in my mind I would rather fantasizeabout selling weed, or something than sell myself to some old geezer.

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  • If both sides are okay with it, I don't see much of a problem. It's a win-win situation. In case that girl/boy do not like her/his sponsor and it's only doing it for money & gifts, I don't get it.

    As a man, I wouldn't do it, cause it's better to make money and buy things I do want on my own.

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  • It’s a consensual relationship and nobody’s business. That said, if either party is married and “keeping” a man or woman behind their partner’s back, I think it’s disgusting. I know of a guy who used to be a good friend who has a girlfriend half his age, whom I also know to be a slut. The guy’s wife is an ovarian cancer survivor and she knows all about the other woman but doesn’t even have the strength to divorce him. I’ve heard that the girl has told people that the guy said that he’ll marry her when his wife dies. Totally sickening. The wife is a nice woman too,, who I’ve known for 30 years.

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  • A hooker, it’s just paying a hooker.

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  • I just think its pretty stupid with those relationships.

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  • I been looking for a daddy or like even a pimp since I need side cash.

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  • I wish it was a common and normal thing when I was young. I would have loved having a sugar daddy

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    • If you had one, then you would likely have a harder time taking care of yourself if your sugar daddy broke up with you, as those relationships don't last too long.

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  • Some guys, even who can easily land a normal relationship, get off on the power of making a girl do whatever they want because she needs money.

    Also some guys have a fetish for being used and even prefer that the sugar baby treats them like shit.

    I say let them do what they want but it's not my thing.

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  • I dated a guy once who seemed like he wanted this kinda thing but without calling it for what it is because he kept offering me expensive gifts and said he wanted me to be his girlfriend in return. I was really uncomfortable by it.
    I have no opinion on those who actually want to be in something like that though. Me, i'd just feel dirty and fake if I was but I don't judge those who are in one especially if it's a mutual agreement and something they both want.

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  • I mean if someone offered me good money to fuck them I'd do it. So money for a relationship sure ok but I dont see the point

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  • I think it really just depends on the situation and the people involved

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  • I think as long as they are both consenting adults I do not see the problem with it

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  • If thats what they wanna do I dont care. I dont really concern myself with things like this.

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