Pick a hand

and I'll tell you what you won and what you missed out on. The game resets for each new player and can only be be played once per person

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Comments ( 83 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • Good post

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  • *Grabs both simultaneously*

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  • I chose the right hand (as in the correct hand). So gimme a prize.

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    • That's no hand

      ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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  • Righto

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    • You get: a 20kg bucket of mac & cheese

      You missed out on: a gross infection from after a dog bit your hand

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  • I pick right.

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    • You get: the constant feeling like you didn't wipe properly

      You missed: The Great Depression

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  • Left

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    • You get: a haunted 1st generation iPod Touch

      You missed: a non-haunted Microsoft Zune

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  • Left

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    • You get: water tastes like whatever beverage you want just by thinking about it. If you think of alcohol while drinking water, it still has intoxicating effects without the damage to your liver

      You missed: unlimited attempts at taking the SAT

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  • Left

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    • You get: your dream man or woman falls madly in love with you, but you're not allowed to call them by any pet names or else that love turns to bloodlust

      You missed: developing the strength of 10,000 Dwayne Johnsons

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      • That's sort of bad. I do not want to get involved in any relationship. Guess I would just spend the rest of my life sending him away.

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  • Suck. Mah. Dick.

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  • Left

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    • You get: the ability to read the mind of one person somewhere on the planet. Unless and until they think it to themselves, you don't know who this person is or where they are. You can turn this on and off

      You missed: some unoriginal Batman joke about your username that you've probably heard before

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  • Right!

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    • You get: a grenade along with a written pardon from the president himself excusing you from whatever crime you commit with the grenade

      You missed: becoming instantly fluent in Tagalog

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  • Left

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    • You get: a VHS copy of Hook starring Robin Williams

      You missed: being unable to hold a regular conversation without using the phrase "but and then" before every sentence

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  • Left

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    • You get: a pitch-black Bombay cat who fetches you little gifts in exchange for cuddles. These gifts range from typical cat gifts (dead birds, mice, etc.) to the titles and keys of luxury cars

      You missed: eating the world's first and only known perfectly rolled burrito

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  • Left

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    • You get: every time you jump, hop, fall, or otherwise enter a state where your entire body is suspended in the air, the speed of your descent back to the ground is increased by 10cm/second. This can potentially progress up to terminal velocity

      You missed out on: Tweeting a hilarious Judeo-Christian joke that is both so funny and wholesome that it ends all conflict in the Middle East and causes the formation of a coalition promoting peace and unity between Muslims, Jews, and Christians while Hinduism is demoted from a religion to a club

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      • So in exchange for no peace in the middle east I get the practical ability to fly short distances? Since my acceleration due to gravity would only be 0.01 meters a second.

        Done I of course wont survive shear drops but this will allow me to effectively glide myself from rooftop to rooftop. Or to jump on top of buildings with one leap.

        Or is this to addition of my gravity? In that case I probably wont notice that effect unless I was already falling to my death.

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        • It's cumulative. For example, if you jumped right now, the speed at which you fall back to the ground would be your regular falling speed but 10cm/second faster. The next time you jumped, it would be the new speed but 10cm/second faster and so on

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          • Does touching the ground include any vehicles I might be in? Like if i was in a balloon would a balloon have to work extra hard for every extra trip?

            I am an entrepreneurial person.

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            • Let's say that clothes count as your person but anything else like vehicles don't

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  • Right.

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    • You get: the truth of how the universe came into being

      You lose: all control of your bowels any time you see the color blue

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      • What kind of a prize is that... Every time I get out of the house I'll piss/ shit myself, cause the sky is blue? Wtf?!

        One of my cars is blue, my favorite color is blue, I can't go to the beach (and I love going to the beach), there is blue even on the firefox logo... And all for what? Learn how the universe started - it's the big bang, everyone knows that.
        And even if it isn't... who cares? I can't even use this knowledge to gain anything. I'm no physicist, so I can't back up my claims.

        I can't help, but feel a little bit ripped off... XD

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        • Now it's blue and green

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          • No, no, no... it doesn't work this way. If I can only play once, I win one thing and lose one thing. No adding, or taking away stuff.

            I studied economics mate, I could sit and discuss terms with you all day, but I won't cause it's night time in my case and I gotta go to bed.

            PS: Don't make me leave a bad yelp review!

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            • No adding or taking away stuff, but I can clarify what you got. The Big Bang is how the universe was created but you understand where all the matter originated, why it was densely packed together, and what served as the catalyst for the Big Bang

              Hopefully you feel less cheated. Whiner.

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  • Right

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    • You get: a first-edition copy of Dianetics signed by L. Ron Hubbard himself

      You miss: a great opportunity to save big! 5 wings for $9.95 at Buffalo Wild Wings (only at participating locations; not available in Alaska or Hawaii)

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  • squirrel

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    • // left = 0
      // right = 1

      if (user.response !== 0 && user.response !== 1) {
      return 'Please choose a boolean value. Geez.';
      }

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  • Left

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    • You lose: your left hand

      You get: a second right hand on your left stump. This hand whispers secrets from the future when you suck on the fingers. You don't have control over it

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      • What happens if someone else sucks on the fingers ?
        One bad drunk night and that hand is gone

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        • ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
          only one way to find out

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  • I chose left because I am left-handed

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    • You get: a room that grants you the ability to conjure up whatever you want while you're in there just by thinking about it

      You also get: a really annoying person in the room who isn't allowed to leave and loudly questions every single item you conjure up

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      • Sounds fair
        I mean I could conjure up a tornado and get it to chase the person lol

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  • Right.

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    • You get: some of the sickest drift racing skills the streets have ever seen

      You miss: your firstborn child's birth (because you were doing some sweet drifting on the way to the hospital and lost track of time)

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  • Left

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    • You get: the entire Florida panhandle to yourself

      You miss: literally the most important news of your entire life and it can't be repeated by anyone

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      • So how does that news part work. If its aliens do people just not talk about when they arrive or can they only talk about it offhand and not as the direct topic.

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        • Everyone forgets the news immediately after hearing it so they can't tell

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  • Left

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    • You win: permanent satisfaction with your physical appearance

      You lose: others' satisfaction with your physical appearance. Everyone who sees you now sees you as a different race, and it's always an offensive negative stereotype of that race

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      • Hah! I used to be an obese slob who didnt bathe much. People who think I'm unsightly is nothing new to me. XD

        As for permanent satisfaction with my physical appearance, I'm fine with that too. My body is bony around my ribcage and hips. I'd like to be happy with it.

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        • Is that bad genetics or do you have an eating disorder. If it's the former I feel like theres surgeries out there to give you more bulk. If it's the latter sorry to hear about that.

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  • For the person who voted and didn't comment

    You get: you permanently lose one of your most traumatic memories as well as one of your happiest memories

    You miss: losing two of your happiest memories while forming a new traumatic one

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  • i chose right

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    • You get: a real life genie. Not one who corrupts your wishes either

      You miss: the chance to make a difference in a loved one's life

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      • hmm but then couldn't i use the genie to make differences in my loved one's lives anyway? like i could just tell the genie i wish to give each of my friends 10 million dollars or something

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        • You can wish for whatever you want. Except for longer weenor. That's the only rule

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    • Vaas suck on my finger I promise it will pay off

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