My stepdad makes me uncomfortable

my stepdad will spank my butt and touch my thigh/upper leg. for example today i had my leg up while i was sitting on the couch and he spanked my butt a few times then looked at me in the eyes. i got such a weird feeling and vibe. i am almsot 15 and i am a girl, he is a man i’m not even related to. he is a super nice guy don’t get me wrong, but i don’t think it’s normal for your stepdad to wanna touch ur butt when you’re almost a full grown adult!!? i notice he doesn’t really do it around my mom or when she can see. i don’t think he would ever hurt me i know he loves me and wouldn’t try to make things wierd bewteen us. i’m so confused please help

Voting Results
6% Normal
Based on 32 votes (2 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 20 )
  • radar

    Trust your gut that it's weird. He knows exactly what he's doing and it's not okay.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • DADNSCAL

    You need to tell your mother about it asap. He’s molesting you and must stop before he gets the idea he can go farther.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Boojum

    He's totally out of line.

    Women should always trust their gut feelings when it comes to guys. If this feels wrong to you, then there's most likely something squirrelly going on his his head. Whether it's something really nasty, only he can say, but it would be wisest for you to assume the worst.

    If you like the guy and you think that he and your mother are good together, then dealing with this might be a little tricky. Telling your mother about this would probably be the least confrontational thing for you, but it could create all sorts of tensions in the house.

    I suspect that maybe the best first step would be for you to tell him clearly that you don't like what he's doing. If he really is a decent guy, he should simply accept that and stop. If he asks you to explain why, tells you that you're being over-sensitive, tries to dismiss your request in any other way or just ignores your request and continues, then he's really not a nice guy at all, and you'll need to involve your mother.

    If she doesn't accept what you say at face value and take your side, then she's not a very nice person either.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • olderdude-xx

    Its' unclear if this is intentional or not.

    Please have a direct conversation with him. Start with "Dad - we need to talk about something important" to get his attention.

    Then tell him that you are growing up and consider your body as your private property. That you do not think his touching your butt (outside of an emergency situation) is appropriate, and whatever other contact area you consider off limits.

    Tell him that you understand that he may not have recognized that. Then tell him that you expect him to treat you property as a young lady; and that you want a fantastic father daughter relationship.

    Sometimes people need someone to clarify things - as they are carrying on behavior from when you were younger and it was harmless.

    My guess is that he will apologize and things will resolve themselves.

    If they don't after that - then you need to seek other family intervention help before things get worse.

    I wish you the best with this...

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Curiouskitten444

    Do you trust your mom? If not you may need to reach out to services for help. This is not okay and he knows what he's doing is wrong. It's inappropriate and when you're older you'll understand how terrible what he did was.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • SwickDinging

    He isn't a super nice guy and he is definitely doing this on purpose.

    What's your relationship like with your mum? The best thing in most circumstances would be to tell her, but this only works if she's a good mum.

    I would try to avoid being alone with your step dad as much as possible. If telling your mum isn't an option, or you tell her and she doesn't protect you, then please tell one of your school teachers.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • RoseIsabella

    You NEED to tell your mother!

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • S0UNDS_WEIRD

    Sounds weird.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • 1WeirdGuy

    Next time he does it say stop thats pedo shit

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • a-curious-bunny

      Technically she's to old for it to be pedo. Though amusingly she said she finds it weird that he would want to touch her when she's almost an adult.

      Would it be better if she was a small child? Hmm op? Would you rather he touch children cause that's what it sounds like.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
        -
      • 1WeirdGuy

        But if she calls it ped0 shit maybe he will stop. Idk what you call it but its friggin weird. Id take a stand and let him know it makes me uncomfortable

        Comment Hidden ( show )
          -
        • a-curious-bunny

          But she's not. Shes litterly saying and I quote "but i don’t think it’s normal for your stepdad to wanna touch ur butt when you’re almost a full grown adult!!?"

          Comment Hidden ( show )
            -
          • 1WeirdGuy

            She needs to tell him to stop if it makes her uncomfortable

            Comment Hidden ( show )
              -
            • a-curious-bunny

              Obviously but she's still saying its weird that hed want to touch someone who's almost an adult. Its fucking weird thatd shed think that

              Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Gen4ConsoleVet

    Make it clear to him that you do not like the behavior. If it persists, tell someone you trust. These days it's easier to get someone to listen. An adult, especially if it's your stepdad, is supposed to be a mentor. He does not need to be touching your butt.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • roligkille

    You need to tell your mom asap. Tell her to throw the creep out. If she doesn't do anything call the cops.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • iMaNhEpPi

    Extremely NOT normal tell somebody already. He is dangerous and he will do it again and even worse. Trust your gut girl and if he ever touches you again call it out ( as long as u think its safe ). Make him uncomfortable and never show him fear.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Mini69

    He can come across as Mr nice guy, but he’s a perv. You should speak to your mother about it.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Mw2-OG

    100% WAY out of line. He’s not your stepdad. He’s your moms boyfriend / husband. That’s it. I say tell somebody about what he’s doing man seriously

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Very nice.

    Comment Hidden ( show )