My brother is very hard to contact and is always unreliable

My older brother is 34 years old. Ever since I can remember, he has been very hard to understand. He rarely answers phone calls, sleeps whenever, and is never reliable. My mother says that he has been uncommunicative since he was born.

He told me that he was going to take me somewhere on Monday. He called and said that he would be coming to my house in about an hour and that he hadn't forgotten. This is the last I heard from him. It's not really that surprising because he has done this countless times. he has a sleeping disorder and he probably fell asleep. He could have left immediately after calling me instead of "waiting an hour". He probably decided to lie down for "a minute" and that minute turned into only God knows how long.

He is a lawyer and works on civil cases. I have no idea how is is a functional individual if he is this way with everybody. My mom says that it's not personal. Even though he has always been this way, it seems to be getting worse. He needs to get over is aloofness and unreliability. My parents and I have talked to him about this before. Sometimes he gets better for brief time and then relapses into being very hard to contact again. I don't know how to quickly snap him out of it. I'm trying not to drop by his house unannounced, but it's getting to the point where it might be the only option.

I want to know what is going on. He seems to have nothing to hide, but he just never talks about his job or life in general. He is the #1 person in my life that consistently makes me happy when he finally shows up. If he died, disappeared, or left me totally, my life would not be worth living. I've told him how important he is to me, but I think he just doesn't understand. My parents and I need regular contact, otherwise we get worried. Most of the time I see him at his house because he can't get his shit together enough to travel 10 miles to my house. I just don't get it. I don't know what to do. Do you have a person in your family like this, and if so how do you deal with it?

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Comments ( 4 )
  • Ihidabody

    Maybe you're nothing but an annoyance to him.

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  • Cuntsiclestick

    I've come to accept that when siblings grow up and move out on their own, they just drift apart. I suggest you worry less about them and focus on yourself since you probably don't mean as much to him as he does to you.

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  • 1WeirdGuy

    Drugs???

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  • olderdude-xx

    I understand; and also have a family member who is unreliable and untrustwrothy.

    I just don't expect them to do anything anymore and make my plans without worrying about them. I also am not worried about what happens in their life: They chose their life and can live with their choices.

    I've got enough to worry about with my personal family and friends who are reliable and support each other on things.

    We see each other occasionally and just talk about light things in life.

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