Isn’t it normal i hate myself because i’m fat?

So I joined weight watchers a week ago and have been working out and eating better without messing up. But, I’m also super depressed that I even let myself go this far. I’m about 230 pounds. I used to be so curvy I just never paid attention to all the weight I was gaining. I figured once I finally felt like enough was enough and started working on myself, which I am now, that I would feel better but I’m not motivated there’s no boost of confidence and I’m just really depressed. I still have not given up I don’t want to I won’t let myself. But is there a way I can get through this without coming out at the end healthy but depressed?

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79% Normal
Based on 19 votes (15 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • SwickDinging

    Another one here saying that you need to learn to love yourself regardless of your weight. Obviously it's not good to be overweight but it doesn't mean that you are worth less as a person. Your aim should be to try and feel happy and confident regardless of weight, age etc

    Much easier said than done of course ...if you ever manage to do this please tell me your secret

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  • RoseIsabella

    What you need to to is learn to love, and accept yourself. I'm not saying that you need to love and accept the fact that you are overweight, but that you need to love and accept yourself as a person with a heart, soul and mind. You need to challenge the negative thoughts and beliefs that you hold against yourself.

    Okay, I'm going to give you an example myself of this. So let's say I am thinking, "I'm fat and lazy, and I hate myself". Now what I need to do is to challenge that with 3 to 5 positive things:
    1.) I'm not lazy, every morning when I wake up I always wash my cat's bowls and feed him first.
    2.) I'm not lazy, I always go next door, and unload my elderly parents car whenever they need it I do heavy lifting for them.
    3.) I'm not unlovable, I know that God loves me.
    4.) I'm not unlovable, I know that my parents love me.
    5.) I've not unlovable, I know my Siamese cat loves me.

    Now it's your turn, get out a piece of paper and a pen, then write down 3 to 5 positive statements that challenge your negative thoughts, and beliefs about yourself. 🙂 Don't be shy, you can do it. 😋

    Another thing you can do is to look for some positive affirmations, and meditation that you can say to encourage yourself. You need to value yourself, and UNDERSTAND that you are worth the trouble of starting a pattern of healthy eating, and regular exercise. You are worthy of the benefits of good health that come from eating healthy and exercising.

    I hope my suggestions help you. If you want it you can do better, and feel better.

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  • Ellenna

    Normal, but pointless. It's unrealistic to expect a boost in confidence to be immediate: presumably it took you a long time to put all that weight on and it won't vanish overnight.

    Surely there's support for your feelings at Weight Watchers? If not it's not a good group for you to belong to.

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    • Not sure I just started only went to one workshop, the program is through my university so the meetings are at specific times

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  • leggs91200

    My room mate would kill to weigh only 230.

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    • I’ve been told that many people would love to be my weight especially since I really don’t look like a heavy person.

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  • andrewwalker

    Yes, obviously it's very normal to hate yourself as you are fat. And the reason is, you see fit people around you all the time, so you feel jealous and it hurts also. That's why you start hating your body. Either you lose weight or don't, but develop this habit before anything else because it will make you conscious of your choices. Just be yourself.

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  • whoah55

    It is normal to not like yourself for letting yourself go. What makes the difference is are you going to do about it. Having discipline is good and will get easier with time. Bashing yourself for messing up will set you up to fail and you won't see any permanent change. Just remember weight loss is 80% diet 20% exercise and good luck

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  • raisinbran

    Weight Watchers doesn't work. Start with persistent record keeping. Calories, exercise, weight, etc. - quantify everything. Develop this habit before anything else because it will make you conscious of your choices.

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  • could take years

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  • Doesnormalmatter

    That's definently normal. We are physiologically wired to see overweight bodies as less attractive because they are less healthy and able to defend themselves. In obese and overweight people, anxiety and depression rates tend to go up in many cases. How you feel is normal, and I wouldn't kid yourself, just lose the weight if you want these thoughts to go away.

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  • Columbusbiguy

    Once you learn to love yourself, regardless of your weight, then you will have achieved what you are looking for. People place too much emphasis on weight loss which will then equal self esteem and confidence. Truth is, even if you lose the weight, you may start picking apart something else about yourself. Love yourself no matter what. Try to be positive and if you weigh 230, 215, or whatever, then it is what it is. If you tie happiness purely to your weight, you will probably never be totally happy with yourself. But that does not mean dont work on improving yourself.

    You will be good. Keep working at it and find an exercise you enjoy and soon you will be looking forward to the gym and the weight will fall off in no time.

    Best of luck.

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  • Ummitsstillme

    Very normal, man or woman you are benificial if you burn more calories than you consume. Chasing weight watchers isn't a bad way to notice your calorie input.

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