Is there a chance my daughter will be taken from me?

I'm a 24 year old single dad, I had my daughter when I was 16 and won full custody at 19. Two months ago I was put on medication for paranoid schizophrenia, I wasn't having major fits but it got pretty bad a few times before the medicine.

I'm so incredibly afraid of losing my daughter. I'm very steady financially and with my job, but besides a female friend, I have no help with raising my girl. I'm clean, rarely drink, she's happy with me, and I love her more than anything. But I'm losing my mind and she's starting to notice. She's 8 and she's a bright kid, she's quick to tell me when I'm acting different or overreacting. She shouldn't have this pressure I know. Her mother is in and out of prison, useless, no job, no money, dirtbag boyfriend.

I've sat up hours at night with my gun in the living room just staring down the front door thinking someone is going to burst through and take her away from me. I can't have that, I've worked so hard, she wants to be here with me. I know I'm hearing people whisper behind my back that I'm not fit to have her and I lash out, but sometimes it's just my brain making things up. But I know they all think it. I've lost 34 pounds since being diagnosed, and I wasn't overweight, and I barely sleep. I do everything I can to hide my paranoia from her but I think I'm fucking up and everything is going to fail. I feel like someone is coming to hurt me or my girl and I can't sleep. I know something's going to happen that I need to stop but I don't know what.

There's a high chance 10
There's a medium chance 12
There's a low chance 15
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Comments ( 17 )
  • You need to control your paranoia with the antipsychotic medication otherwise much worse things than your daughter taken away may happen. I have seen schizophrenia destroy lives by my own eyes.

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  • Rilley

    it doesn't sound like the medicine is working, visit your doctor to either have a stronger dose or be prescribed a different brand.

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  • McBean

    Do you have a trusted family member that an help you and your daughter? Perhaps your Mother, sister, or a female in-law? You need to start trusting your own family at least. Your daughter needs to see this trust in action. Your daughter should have a good female role model as well.

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    • My family isn't in this country and we don't speak to each other, my female friend is very kind to her and doubles as a babysitter whenever I ask. I try to be friends with the moms from my daughters school though, but I'm not the friendly type.

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      • McBean

        What country do you live in?

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  • Tealights

    You may need to try a different medication, or add antidepressant to the mix to calm you down. So there maybe a lot of trial and error, which means you have to watch yourself closely and report to your doctor of any changes both positive or negative.

    Either way, talk to your psychiatrist. If you have the money, get a therapist if possible to talk out your paranoid thoughts too (have 2 doctors basicially), because a lot of psychiatrist only focus on giving you drugs and how they're working, rather than helping you achieve peace of mind with talking things out. With schizophrenia, you'll need both the right medication and talking things out.

    I hope everything goes well. You're a great father, and your daughter loves you, never doubt that.

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    • I'm in the process of getting a regular therapist. And thank you.

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    • sillygirl77

      Agreed and OP until you're regulated with meds that work for you should have your daughter live with your parents, family member or a friend you trust.

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      • I don't speak to my family and they are not in this country anyway, but I've tried becoming friendly with the mother of my daughters mom. She's a kind woman, but lives in another state and lives on welfare.

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  • I don't see how you're being helpful here. Or did you only come to be negative?

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  • factcheck

    Like Rilley said, your medication is not working. You need to go back to your doctor ASAP. It's your paranoid schizophrenia that's keeping you up at night and making you hear voices. Get the treatment you need and you won't have to worry about your daughter being taken away.

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  • rayb12

    You have to be logical and always remember that your thinking is paranoid and skewed. Even when you don't know what's real you must believe something. And it cannot be your paranoid delusions. You will figure out a solution.

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  • crygypsy

    You need to have FAITH. Not talking religion here but you need some serious self-confidence. Easier said than done I know but do whatever you can to build it whether it being following positive pages on your social media or talking to your therapist more often than usual. Positive self talk is a must. Stop with the negative thinking. Everything will be fine. Try practicing self care. Do things to better yourself mentally and physically. Try working out/going for jogs. You can even bring your daughter! Try a subscription box for fun (I love bulu box) it's a supplement box. It gives me something to be excited about. Follow Bryant McGill on Facebook and read his writings daily. Take a deep breath.

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    • Drunkuncle

      Not to be a dick but "self-care" isn't going to fix schizophrenia. An illness like that requires medication. faith will do nothing for mental illness

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      • crygypsy

        Was expecting comment like yours. Faith doesn't cure illness but it is better than not practicing it at all. I also have a "mental illness" and on top of my medication, the things I have listed help me. Each to their own though.

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  • Couman

    I said "low chance" but that's IF you can keep it together. You do something stupid and the chance goes up substantially.

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  • bubsy

    Melatonin for sleeping, and take whatever drugs you've been prescribed. If you constantly suffer spikes of anxiety or uncertainty, especially if they come up with past memories, I highly recommend you check out the program at selfauthoring(dot)com. Writing reconfigures where the brain stores memories in your head.

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