Is it wrong to have a type?

I know a few people who have judged me strongly for having this type preference before. I don't really have a gender/sex preference. Generally If I like the personality I won't notice if they are male or female. A lot of this I think is based on my childhood. I was very smart as a kid but very neglected. My parents had apperent mental disorders and as the eldest child was given role as caretaker and theripist. At 18 my existance was not to get a job and be an adult but to appease them. My household always had a lot of fighting and problems and screaming. As a kid I was obsessed with serial killers. They made no sense to me becuase I was told crime is wrong so in my mind there no logical reason to commit crime. I ended up understanding at a young age monsters are often products we create. I thought I could save the world so that we would have less monsters if we fixed the schools, the economy, how we raise kids. However this mindset set off a number of raders. The thought if you associated with trouble you are trouble. I would gravitate towards the troubled, mentally ill children in my HS in my Middle school and tried to save them. I developed people pleasing behavior while inside I was deeply disgusted with most of society but proper and perfect as ever. Fast foward I was disowned by both parents. I have a job and I excell at work and do a lot of extra duties just to keep busy. I am a workohilic, a perfectionist, people pleasing and have a lot of homosexual tendencys. I can still only become attracted to people with some sort of issue but some people say that makes me sick. I clearly have a strong preference. I tried dating the average normal type. I am immediately turned off by them. Is it really so wrong to only be attracted to these type of people?

Is It Normal?
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  • It isn't wrong to have a type, but if you're going after "the troubled" so you can "save them", it sounds pretty dehumanizing. Like a savior complex or something.

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    • I do have a savior complex. However I am already so set in my ways at this piont. I can not be attracted to anything else.

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  • What are you talking about? Are you capable of communicating coherently?

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  • Short answer, I'd say it depends.

    It's pretty common for people who experience trauma to seek out those who can relate, and that can be a healthy thing. However, seeking out those who are deep in a disorder that they have not dealt with will only bring disorder to your life.

    There's a lot of theories on why hybristophiliacs and the like exist- everything from a savior complex to the relative safety of creating a relationship that can not be actualized (like if you get with a sociopath/psychopath, actual empathic emotional connection on their part becomes a non-threat).

    I'd say it depends on WHY you are attracted to these types of people. Figuring that out will take a lot of self reflection.

    Knowing your tenancies, you also have to be very careful about whom you invite into your life & what they bring to the relationship. Troubled people run the risk of bringing trouble, manipulation & abuse into your life.

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  • Im very attracted to narcissistic women. Even if theyre serial killers or something. They're just really appealing for a one night stand.

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