Is it normal to have a messy head?
So, when I say "messy head" I just mean that your thoughts are very disorganized.
Okay, I have some weird habit of connecting current things happening to past events, even if there are no obvious connections (most of the time, there isn't a connection at all).
For example, I could be sitting in class, and suddenly it'll feel like this memory from my babysitter's house, remembering that I'm standing by the window, looking out (mind you, I'd be in class, nowhere near the window). Does that make sense? I'll make connections between hanging out with friends to sitting at my cousin's house, connections between the movie Wall-E and a clown nose, connections between drinking coffee to highway signs.
It's hard for me to exist sometimes when I feel like I'm constantly being pulled into my own head, into past memories, and connections are being made that aren't relevant. Usually, I can push past them, sometimes, if it's particularly strong, I'll mention it to a friend, "oh, this reminds me of..." but if I'm under the influence (usually alcohol or weed), it's much harder to stay in the present. I find that I can spiral, and get almost trapped in my head.
Usually, it's a couple of thoughts stacked ontop each other. The forward thoughts are relevant things (what should I eat? Don't forget to do the homework. I need more milk. etc.)
The middle thoughts are less obvious things (this feels like I'm in 2009. I'm stuck in the memory of an auditorium. Hasn't this happened already? Hey, this isn't relevant, but connect you walking to campus with a memory of you falling off a bike).
Then, there's music. I listen to music for 80% of my day, honestly. It helps me if I'm falling into memories too much, but usually, it falls into a background noise all the time. I could wake up with a song in my head, singing along while I'm thinking about breakfast and things to do. Like, multiple thoughts at once, stacked atop each other. Lately, I've been noticing this, and it's annoying me.
I don't know if this is relevant, but I've been diagnosed with depression (and anxiety), was on meds for a couple months but gave up. I'm not schizophrenic or have ADD/ADHD to my knowledge. I've spoken to a counselor about this before, she said it was fine as long as I can realize where I am and my current reality.
Does anyone else suffer from whatever this is? Or is this normal? Is this just the way people think?