Is it normal to hate spending time or even just being around family

I hate being around my family. I can’t stand it. I mean I have anxiety and depression but no one in my family knows I’ve been tested for it too. They have done things but it was in the past. I have wanted to run away from home so many times, but I could never leave my baby sister. I don’t have the same religious believe as my family does, they don’t accept that. I hate being in this house I don’t feel safe and I don’t like it. But I want to like spending time with my family I just don’t know why or how I can. I’ve told my self I’ve forgevin them for everything they’ve done but, it seems like they still do it and it’s like deep down I haven’t yet. And Idk what the freak I should do. Talking to them does nothing and it’s 3 years till I can leave without them calling the cops on me or it being called run away. And Idk if I can do it for that long.. please help!

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Comments ( 5 )
  • 309uf2o38yf

    Me and my younger cousin left the family home for similar reasons. He has severe anxiety and is very shy, borderline agoraphobic. And we both left the religion in a very christian home, which caused a hostile environment. So we got jobs and moved out.

    Really the only way you can get along with family in these situations is distance. It really improves the relationship when you can go home and take a break after interacting.

    Having your own room is not the same as having your own home. They will respect you more if they see you as a self-sufficient adult Instead of a stubborn child.

    I don't know where you are, but in the US, You can get job at 15. If you manage to do that, you can apply for emancipation and become your own guardian early. I'd start job hunting if I were you.

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  • HeyItsRalph

    First and foremost, please take a moment to breathe.

    Inhale.
    1
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    Exhale.

    Good, now, I just want you to know that whatever it is that you are going through, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. There are plenty of us just like you. Do you sometimes feel like they put on a facade? Or maybe you notice things that others don't? That scoff, eyeroll, raise of the eyebrows, whatever it is. You see past it, and that's good.

    I highly recommend you take some time to take a personality test and find out what personality type you are. I know that may sound dumb, but trust me, it is totally worth it. Also, please be 100% honest with yourself when doing it. Here's a link.

    https://www.16personalities.com/

    If I haven't lost you by now, believe me when I say that taking steps to understand yourself and that you are not alone, is beautiful.

    Best of luck.

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  • sissycakes

    i used to have these issues. i think it is really sweet that you want to stay for your sister.

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  • In regards to your anxiety, depression, and surmounting impatience:

    The way you feel sounds similar to how I felt around my parents, dad especially.

    Personally, I find that in times of anxiety and depression, taking baby steps towards my goals is best, instead of fantasizing about the end result, and wishing it were now.

    "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step". Similarly, where you want to be in 3 years begins today.

    Remember that every crappy day that passes, you're moving forward.

    Keeping busy, and expanding your life and activities farther beyond family life may also help you pass the time, and become more independent.

    In regards to your relationship with your family:

    The answer to most family problems is simply getting a job, and moving out. Could you move somewhere close, so that you can check up on your sister often?

    Diffuse and/or avoid conversations about religion. Try to find common ground. It should be possible, unless they're absolute zealots with no other interests.

    They probably want to have a better relationship with you as well. Forgiveness is good, but I wouldn't count on them changing.

    If they don't respect you, no healthy, close relationships can be formed. Trusting them would likely lead to disappointment.

    Settling for shallow relationships, where conversations consist of pleasant small talk, seems like the most practical route to finding any enjoyment in their presence.

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  • IrishPotato

    Suck up the three years and move out. You're literally like most teens nowadays.

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