Is it normal to fear having sex

I am 29 and have tried having sex with several men but freak out because their too demanding rough or dominate I have never meet a gentle man and never been in a serious relationship because of this is there men out there who take it slow or are they really just like this ? I'm scared I want find a man and because I'm a bigger girl I often wonder if its just me ! My biggest fear is never trusting someone and never loving anyone . Mostly I lie and people around me have no idea I feel like this as I struggle to explain how I feel so I hide it. All I want is someone to care about me treat me gentle hug me and be there for me . I get away with lying because I'm strong independent business manager and just act like I'm fussy and nobody sees the real me. But I'm tired of it and lonely how do I overcome my fear or find that nice guy I don't want to die alone and sad

Voting Results
63% Normal
Based on 8 votes (5 yes)
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Comments ( 5 )
  • starie

    You want someone to love you not just have sex with you.

    Someone who loves you will be kind, true and not have sex as the main goal. Someone who loves you will be happy enough just to be with you. Someone who just wants sex will be rough since to them it will just be a phisical thing, not emotional.

    No one that's worth knowing really cares if your fat or not. If you're confident with yourself and true to your personality then that's what matters.

    I'd just try being myself and living my life without only thinking about trying to find a guy. That way i'd meet new people who'd like me for me and if a guy comes along, he'll probably be more likly to like you for you and not just use you for sex.

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  • peterrabbyt3

    I wish we could meet. You sound like a lovely woman and I would take care of you forever.

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  • RomeoDeMontague

    What is with all the run on sentences today. Please use periods! You know the only time I think a man would be incredibly rough like this is S&M. Maybe you just have found them in the wrong places. Their is gentle men out their who are sensitive and caring. Also some dudes like chubby chicks.

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  • paradox90

    Perhaps you were looking for men in the wrong places? I know many guys whom I can consider gentlemen. Don't worry, you are quite young...

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  • quentari

    Have you tried online dating? sometimes in the "pool" of men in your area it's hard to find one that's not a complete asshole (the good ones are taken or never in the right place or the right time)

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