Is it normal that i don't want to talk to my mum about my hopes and dreams?

So basically, I don't like talking to my mum about my hopes and dreams, because she always ends up using it against me.

For example, I told her that I wanted to be famous in the future. Then, when she gets mad at me, she would say stuff like "You're never gonna get famous".

One time, she even said that I might actually end up famous, but for doing something bad, so I'd be famous like Hitler. (She literally called me Hitler).

Another time, when I was 11 or 12 or so, I told my mum that I wanted to be an engineer. Then, sometime this year, she said to me:
"Remember years ago you said you wanted to be an engineer? Well, you don't want to be an engineer anymore. You see, things change. So maybe this transgender thing is a phase".
In case you haven't figured it out, I'm trans, and my mum tried to disprove me being trans by using something completely unrelated I said years ago.

So it doesn't matter what, if I tell my mum my hopes and dreams, she'll use it against me, one way or another.

I know for a fact that this isn't normal, I just want the statistics to show my mum that it's not normal.

Voting Results
71% Normal
Based on 14 votes (10 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • Wellyoudliketoknoweh

    Your mom sounds like one of those people that don’t know how to raise children
    Yeah like the others said, just don’t tell her. Parents are hard to deal with

    Old folks also tend to relay only on their experiences. What they are forgetting is, u are a different person and everybody goes through life, changing opinions, desires and goals. Maybe it’ll seem stupid later, maybe not, but the important thing is that u made your own decisions. If you don’t, there’s no experience at all, no dreams, no will and you will have problems in dealing with people and life itself. Leave children and others alone and let em do their thing, it’s way healthier
    Your mother also seems like she has some negative experiences with things, she doesn’t know affect u through her, so tell her that she should stop putting her problems on you. But if ur going to tell her, that is your decision, because it’s gonna trigger a fight. She tries manipulating u in a way, not that much but a bit. My mom does it too and they don’t really notice it themselves
    Anyways it’s the same with much older people, I just always nod because those opinions r the most difficult to change. In their eyes we have not gone through anything comparable to their lives

    As for the transgender thing, I know some people who just left home when they couldn’t bear the whole thing anymore, I dunno about ur situation
    Tell her that she can read it in the internet, in books and consult a psychiatrist. Theyre all gonna tell her she shall not even try talking u out of it.

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  • Doesnormalmatter

    Yes. Don't tell her then. Just do it and don't care what she thinks.

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  • sissycakes

    Basically I can say it is sweet that your mom remembers what you tell her. That is a good sign. Also when people get mad they say things that they may not mean just to hurt people. But of course I would keep other things to myself.

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  • Garthh

    My mom asked me who I liked (as in sexuality) I'd been looking for an opening for a while and I told her girls. She then said 'while your still young and don't really know yet' I told her again months later and she told me the same thing and I insisted and told her she didn't get to choose who I liked. She's not homophobic, but just doesn't think I'm gay

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  • Croissant

    Don’t tell her. It’s her loss to miss out on having that connection with you. A lot of parents suck. Hopefully your mum will grow and you can build a better relationship with her one day, but you don’t owe her intimacy if she throws it in your face. It’s ok to feel sad about that too.

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  • dimwitted

    Just live your life. Most folks don't tell their parents anything. Least of all something important to them.

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  • RoseIsabella

    Oh yeah, I get annoyed when people want to pull personal stuff out just so they can use it against you later. People like that don't have much going for them, and aren't worth confiding in as far as I'm concerned.

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