Is it normal that i cried more over the death of my cat than family?

My 16 year old cat Mister Ellis died in August and I miss him terribly. I have cried for him. But I have cried more over him than over the deaths of family members. Is this normal? (respectful answers only please).

Is It Normal?
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  • First of all, I'm so sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is always really hard and devastating.

    Secondly, I do think it is normal, as in a lot of cases, people become closer to their pets that they're around on a daily basis than family members they aren't around as often, and just because two people are related doesn't always mean they have a very close relationship. I also feel that what really adds to the pain is coming home to an empty house and adjusting to them not being there.

    I think it also makes a difference if the family member has been ill for quite some time and you know their days are numbered, and if they're suffering and death will be the end of that (in which case, it's a relief that they're no longer in pain, though it's still sad to see them go).

    We also all grieve differently over different losses in our lives, and that is okay.

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  • Depends who in your family died. Dogs are like family and if the dog lives with you hes like a son. But if its your mother that dies thats always worse than your dog.

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  • Hundred percent normal.

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  • I cried on my grandmother's funeral, but the only death I have ever mourned for a long time was the death of my dog. It's not necessarily whether you see humans or animals as more worth, but simply who you are close to on an emotional level and actually feel something is missing from your life when they are gone

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  • This is more common than you would think. In fact, if you search back through old posts you will see that quite a few people have posted about similar scenarios over the years.

    Pets are part of the family. Very normal to grieve for them in a big way.

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  • Thank you for your replies guys and thank you for being so respectful. God bless you and your families.

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  • I’m sorry for your loss. I know how you feel as I had the same thing happen to me. I was very upset when my grandparents died in 2012, I even had to take a day off school the day after my grandfather died as I was a wreck - and I went to a private school so my parents were not in the habit of letting me take days off.

    Seven years later Monty my large friendly cat who had been by my side from ages 9-23 passed away and honestly it hit me harder. I saw my grandparents every few weeks but I felt Monty’s loss in every room of my house. When you bond with an animal and synchronise together it’s devastating when they die and for the first few months their absence is inescapable.

    If you have a garden I recommend planting something to remember Mister Ellis by. May he rest in peace.

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    • Thank you, Skulls. My niece made him a cross and bought a gravestone Halloween decoration. I wrote an epitaph to him and also placed that on his grave. He is buried in the garden and I visit it twice daily. He was buried with the wrapper from the last cat treat he ever ate.

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      • I’m glad you’re able to have something to honour him. Remember that there is no time limit to feel ok and you’re not taking “too long” mourning your loss. It will get easier eventually but don’t beat yourself up for being sad.

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