Is it normal I'm having a hard time accepting my friend's gay?

My best friend of six years came out to me as gay, I always knew he was sorta fruity but I didn't know he would actually follow through and accept it. He's my best friend, I trust the guy with my life, but I've never known a queer person before and it's just hard to wrap my head around.

I'm whitetrash, I know this, and everybody in our park is real conservative and all, so he asked me to keep it quiet. I'm not religious, but I've been taught my whole life that being queer is wrong. I really want to be there for him though.

I'm tryna do the whole "you don't have to understand to respect something" type deal, but is that enough? I know a lot of queer folk get depressed, he's had some rough spots, and I don't want his best friend to not accept him.

If I could make him straight I would, but he's still my best friend even if he's gay.

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 11 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • Given your background I suppose it's normal. Sounds like you're trying to be a good friend even if it's strange for you, which is commendable.

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  • It's not okay to use your background as an excuse to oppress others.

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  • I'm gay and I can only speak for myself, but I respect you for wanting to be supportive even if it makes you uncomfortable.

    If you're not familiar with gay people then it is naturally going to be a learning curve for you as well, and maybe you can tell him this? He might sense that this isn't sitting well with you, and if he knows why it might be better, just so he doesn't think you're rejecting him.

    Do respect his wishes not to have everyone else know though. If you live in these conservative surroundings and he has sensed that it's not a good idea to be loud and open about it with everyone, he is probably right to feel that way.

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  • Dude, DO NOT CALL YOURSELF WHITE TRASH!

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  • friends should accept each others' differences because everyone always has something different.you might feel uncomfortable about it but yep, learn to accept it. you can talk to him about it so that he can understand how you feel and things might get better. however, you shouldn't think of changing someone. i mean if you wanna imfluence people's personality in a POSITIVE way then it's okay but if you wanna change someone's gender or something then that's definitely not up to you. you might prefer him to be not gay but it's his individual identity that he choose how he lives.

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  • It's not normal and you might be a whiny psychopath.

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  • Its normal chill sure im religious but I live in a whitetrash area to so when my friend came out as bi I freaked out to just chill man hell we may never truly understand our sexuality so its no big deal just gotta chill

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  • Remember it is okay to respect something you disagree with. Even though I am not Muslim, I don't disrespect people that are just because they think differently than me. This is a concept that both liberals and conservatives struggle with. Don't change what you believe in because somebody else believes differently, and don't treat others with disrespect because they think differently.

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  • I seriously don't understand why who you fuck should determine who you are. The two have nothing to do with each other.

    Unless he is one of these flamboyant lifestyle guys it shouldn't really affect your friendship. It's not like he makes you watch.

    I'm bi but no one would be able to tell. Just cause inlike to eat pussy too doesn't mean my personality changes.

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  • If he don't come on to you he is still a good friend.

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