Is it normal to treat very old parents like children?

Both children and parents. I talk to them if they want to, even if I'd rather be quiet. I give them validation because they might need it. I compliment them to make them feel good. I ask simple questions and give encouragement

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89% Normal
Based on 18 votes (16 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • ellnell

    I find very old people tend to revert back to childhood especially since they often start needing help with many things.

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  • S0UNDS_WEIRD

    There's often some overlap between the very young and the very old, especially if the very old experience not just physical declination but cognitive declination or are otherwise out of touch with the modern world, but it's important to keep the differences in mind too.

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  • darefu

    Right now I just hope there are enough young people who care to treat us like people at all.

    My experience with those I work with and know, most of the 35 and under feel if you're 60 or above, that you've lived your life and your opinion doesn't matter. You're just using up resources. If you can take care of yourself fine, if not you should basically be put down, you're too expensive to keep and maintain.

    I don't remember feeling that way when I was younger. I remember thinking what a wealth of knowledge those that were 80,90,+ had. I may not have agreed with their views on certain things but the older I get the more correct they were.

    I fear the new wave of getting rid of history will doom them to repeat it and not place any value on the older people much less care for them.

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  • DADNSCAL

    As an aging parent myself, I find it demeaning when my kids treat me like a child, but sometimes I’ve caught myself acting like a child, so I may deserve it.

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    • charli.m

      There's a difference between "treating someone like a child" and acknowledging similarities, though, I think.

      I guess it depends on the person, though.

      And I can understand that it can feel infantilising to the aging person, regardless of intent.

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    • Contrivance

      I'm not young but maybe I need to be older to know if I'd find it demeaning. But as of now... I think I'd be amused being treated like a child. Sure would be nice to be pampered for a change, shit. Tucked in bed and given a kiss. SING ME A LULLABY ITS BEEN TOO LONG I'VE BEEN HELD *CRIES* Plus think of all the ways you could troll in that roleplay dynamic

      "I made potty todai :3"

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  • charli.m

    I find that my training in Early Childhood Education is reflected in helping care for my 90 year old grandmother. It's obviously not entirely the same, but there's definitely similarities.

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  • Somenormie

    I sometimes treat my grandmother like that, so I have to reteach her things.

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  • Tommythecaty

    We get to an age where we become condescending, yes.

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  • RoseIsabella

    It's not unheard of the treat the very elderly like little kids, especially when the elderly person in question has, or is developing dementia.

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  • olderdude-xx

    In some cases this is true. My grandmother was mentally sharp to the day she died... and it would have been completely disrespectful to treat her as a child: and she would not stand for it at all.

    My mother developed dementia and reverted back to a lot of childhood memories and behavior... and I found that I had to treat her as a child to encourage her in her last months of life. She also died holding my hand as I spent the last 8 days with her essentially 24/7.

    So, it depends on the person and their mental situation.

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  • Grunewald

    I had to treat my nan like that when she got dementia. 'Don't pour water over the electric socket' and 'don't steal things from the other patients' beds' are things you don't normally have to say to adults.

    I tell you what though, even a few months before her death she understood that she was the elder of the two of us and that I was treating her like a child. She upbraided me for it! And she still noticed when I was sad, pushed me for a reason why, and gave me the same wary, disbelieving look she gives to anyone suspected of telling lies, when I gave her a fake answer.

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  • litelander8

    Good job babe! And always remember patience. 😌

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