Is it normal to hang out with ex?
So, I was with a guy for slightly over a year. He was so sweet for the first several months but started to get a little bit emotionally/verbally abusive, demanding of me for money and favours, etc. It turned physical once (nothing severe, he knocked me down because he wouldn't give me my phone back and I refused to leave until he did) and that was the last I saw him for 3 months. He's been an alcoholic for the last 20+ years so that's a factor.
At the beginning of this month he asked me to come over. I went because he was nice on video chat and I thought maybe he had started to see the errors in his ways. He apologized for everything and said he didn't mean to hurt me. But then he went back to saying I can't control my temper, even though I told him over and over that I love him too much to get mad at him. I got upset often because I felt disrespected and arguing with the love of my life absolutely destroyed me. He kept bringing up what happened then said I brought it up, which I didn't. Then he was nice again so for the past week we've hung out as friends a few times. I know I won't have a romantic relationship with him again; my family and two close friends want nothing to do with him, and I don't get to say hi to his sisters anymore which makes me sad because I always loved them. Anyway he's been nicer to me lately than when we were together. Last night we were vibing to music and had dinner together.
I feel some measure of guilt, like maybe I shouldn't hang out with someone who hurt me that many times and who my loved ones dislike. But it's hard for me to say no. A mutual friend (she's sort of my friend but he's known her a lot longer than I have) told me he has children he's not allowed to see. When we met he told me he had two kids ages 19 and 13. I met the 13 year old once. He said he hasn't seen the oldest since she was very small because her mom is a raging b*tch and took her away from him for no reason. But he has 3 more who are 15, 10 and 8 whom he hasn't seen since they were born, if he has at all. I know it's none of my business but maybe if I knew exactly what happened there it would be easier to completely dismiss any feelings I have left for him. So is this normal?