Is it normal to feel the urge to turn my back on a friend?
Long story **NOT so** short:
My friends mom (whom i guess since I'm excommunicated with my original friend, and only talk to her mom now) lost her house back in March, she says "due to the pandemic" but her income (and no other, and has been this same income for 20+ years) is her SSI and her son's SSI/SSD. which is why I was wondering wtf the pandemic had to do with her losing her home (she has gambling issues which I'm aware of that she's secretive about, so maybe it's that and she's embarrassed, idk)
Anyways, so her house was lost in March, she was staying with a friend from March to May, and has been in My City since mid-June (yet I've only heard from her just a few days ago) anyways, so she asked if she could stay with me, I told her it's have to be the garage since I have limited space, and i told her I've got a cpl air mattresses for her & her son as well as a cpl a/c units that'll fit in the Windows of the garage.
Now she's been asking if I still have random items i.e. my tv, my kitchenaid mixer, my backup car, etc and is asking how much all those items are worth and if I've looked into selling them (not TO her, but FOR her) which is was the first red flag, then she asked if the garage is attached to the house, I assumed this inquiry was because she wanted to know if a bathroom was accessible, she then asked about my wiring, what type i have (if i knew) and if i have any gold or platinum jewelry still :/
I told her that I would take pix of the garage but never called her back, nor have texted. She's only called once so far, and I feel guilty since she doesn't "like" the place she's at now. I told her "if it's just 'preference' based at this point, why not just stay where you're at and just limit the amount of times you uproot your son" (who has autism and is having a hard time with all this instability)
This woman was there for me when my mother passed, yet fell off the grid for the last 2 years with me (haven't heard from her since Spring, 2018) and now i feel she's only gotten ahold of me because she needs something, but that's not really how she rolls. It's offputting. Idk if it's gambling, maybe drugs? Idk.
But i feel guilty AF being hesitant to let her stay. I care for her and even more so for her son, he's a good kid, and since Im "on the spectrum/high functioning Au" myself, I'm one of the few people in his life that can relate to him and handle him/calm him down.
Idk what to do. She was there for me when my most painful memory first happened to me and she seems to be in dire straights here, but i just don't trust it.
Am I wrong for being this way?
Am i just as bad since I accepted her comfort when I needed something/someone but now i won't reciprocate because of paranoia??
Is it normal to turn a friend away in a time of need, even when they've never screwed you over before??
Should I give her the opportunity to screw me over before I shut the door in her face? I would assume so, right?
Also, if it isn't a good idea and y'all agree with me to not let her stay at this time, how do you turn someone away without destroying the relationship?
^^^I mainly ask this, not because I have an issue saying No, I say it ALL the time lol, BUT...I don't know how to do it after agreeing to let her stay, then retracting the offer..
Which i WOULDN'T be doing if she asked all these weird invasive questions BEFORE i agreed to let her stay here (who knows..maybe that's why she waited to ask, idk :/ )
I guess if she really is a friend, she will take it in stride, but if she gets all huffy and never wants to speak to me again, then i guess that'll let me know i was just something to use.
God this sucks :\