Is it normal to feel like your whole life was a lie?

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14 Comments

People say everything happens for a reason. But what if you feel regret, like your experiences lead you to a place where you feel like everything you've done meant nothing and was a waste of time?

Is It Normal?
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  • [Old Memory]
    5 years ago | pl

    What exactly do you mean by saying it "was a lie?"

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  • e51pegasi
    5 years ago | pl

    As ray says once you realise the insignificancy of your life & actions in the grand scheme of things, contentment should follow.

    Nothing really matters.

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  • McBean
    5 years ago | pl

    Then you start again, smarter than before.

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  • RoseIsabella
    5 years ago | pl

    Yes, of course it's normal to feel like everything was phoney, a dream or even a lie under the right circumstances. I just got out of a relationship that I very much wanted to work, but it was a verbally and emotionally abusive relationship. Then two weeks ago things suddenly started to turn physical so it's over of course, and it feels very surreal and also feels like it was all just a big lie.

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    • Grunewald
      5 years ago | pl

      Ahh, honey. No, it wasn't a lie. It happened. Cling to what you know is true. Find evidence for it. Take pictures of bruises for safe keeping if you need to. Gaslighting is bad enough, but don't 'gaslight' yourself.

      One life lesson I've learned in my short 27-year life: decent people can, and do, do despicable things. The fact that they're decent/nice/reasonable to everyone else doesn't mean that you're just imagining that they were despicable to you. I also learned that forgiving doesn't mean pretending it didn't happen, or that it wasn't despicable. Give yourself time to process and accept.

      And thank you for your reassurance on my post about my new workplace, and on my post from way back about the gaslighting manager from my old one <3 <3.

      Be patient with yourself. Trust yourself.

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    • McBean
      5 years ago | pl

      I'm sorry. I thought this guy was sort of the one. That's too bad. I'm going to start being nice to you again. I think you're a good woman. Well, sort of good, but not afraid to kick a piece of shit.

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      • RoseIsabella
        5 years ago | pl

        It's not your fault that terrible thing happened to me. I feel like I missed a lot of red flags along the way. I do appreciate your remark about shit kicking, but I really only kicked him to the curb, I never actually physically struck him. He always made himself out to be a victim, lots of abusers do that to brainwash their victims long before they ever attempt to lay a hand on them. Abusers prefer people who won't strike back or defend themselves. I don't think he expected me to call 911, but I don't particularly like being dragged down the street against my will.

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  • rayb12
    5 years ago | pl

    This is true of everyone's life. However knowing this is the first step to true happiness. Once you realize are actions are rather meaningless you are no longer burdened with so many pressures. You can still love and enjoy things but without attachment.

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