Is it normal to feel autistic
Over my entire life I have never been a normal person. I lived my life normally up untill a few years ago. When I was told I might be autistic by my friends. I asled my mother about it and she always just gets angry and denies it. I have always had certain issues that I never told anyone because i didn't wamt to bother them. Even if it makes me suffer. Touching certain things has always been hard for me. Even the thought of it. Touching latex makes me feel gross, it makes me angry. I feel it swell inside me till it is removed. Anything slime related gets me there as well. When I try to eat food i get very picky. If any of it touches I need to seperate it first, then eat one thing at a time. Vegetables because they cool faster and then potato/pasta/rice and finally meat. If too many things cook together i gag inside and refuse to touch it. IE a pot roast with potato and carrots. Also any food like soup that is majorly liquid. I can't even force myself to tatse them. I hate people being to close to me. I only hug my mother twice a year at maximum. Other than that I won't touch anyone if I can help it, and I really try to avoid it. It feels wrong to be touched. When my mom would wake me up as a kid and if she touched me I would hit her without realizing. When I speak I often mumble or talk too quick so I can hurry on to the next idea, some people have a hard time understanding me when I talk. I also have insanely bad handwriting. I feel like I should get checked out with doctors but I'm so scared to do anything. I have a hard time leaving my house. Should I talk to my dad about it even though we don't have much of a relationship. Should I see a doctor? I am unsure.