Is it normal to be depressed because i can't afford new treatments that may help me?

I keep seeing news about these advancements and treatments that are being discovered which may help with many of the health issues that cause me to be disabled. I get excited when I see them, who wouldn't be excited to find out that there may be some new advancement that could give them back something that their health took from them? But then the sad truth hits me. I am disabled because of these ailments that I can't afford to treat because of being on a fixed income. I can't afford the basic, lowest tier treatments for my health, and medicare loves to play games to get out of paying for stuff. So, even though those new treatments could stop me from wanting to die every day due to my health issues and the pain that comes with them, those treatments will remain out of my reach because those conditions are debilitating.

I can't afford the treatments for my conditions because I have those conditions and they render me completely disabled, and those new treatments, they're not cheap. So I end up depressed because, here I am, looking at the potential solution, right there, something that could possibly help, only to be told I don't deserve it because I can't shell out enough money because my conditions keep me too sick to work in order to earn the amount of money needed. It's a catch 22. The people who need those treatments most normally can't afford them because living off of disability keeps us below the poverty line. And the only way to get off of disability (depending the disability of course) is to treat our conditions, which we can't afford to do.

Looking at it just makes my depression more horrid than it normally is. It's not enough that I'm sick, I also have to just watch as the advancements that could potentially help me get out of this bottomless health pit dangle there beyond my reach, like a starving dog watching a juicy steak be dangled right beyond where their chain reaches.

Is it normal to see those things and end up feeling this depressed, angry, and desperate because of it? Are these feelings justified or is it just that living so long like this is starting to get to me?

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Based on 16 votes (15 yes)
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Comments ( 61 )
  • Ellenna

    I'd also be depressed if I lived in a country which doesn't care about the health of the most disadvantaged of its people.

    Australia's health system isn't perfect but it's pretty good. I've had a stent inserted in an artery after a heart attack and cataracts removed, none of which cost me one cent on government benefits.

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    • Oh believe me, if I could afford to move over there, or heck, even just a little north to Canada, I would have already been gone and told the USA to suck it on the way out. I don't understand how so many people can think universal healthcare is a bad thing when almost all the examples of a universal healthcare system have shown extremely positive results.

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      • Boojum

        I was born in the USA and grew up there, but I've lived outside the country since I was in my early twenties. It has long been clear to me that the most amazing thing about the USA is how those in power have brainwashed the bulk of the population to believe that it truly is, in every possible way, The Greatest Country In the World™, and how it's every good American's patriotic duty to bend over and take it up the ass when it benefits those at the top of the system.

        Universal healthcare is a prime example. Those who benefit from the profoundly unfair and extremely expensive system currently in place only need to shout "Socialised medicine!" for all the true-blue, MAGA cap-wearing Americans to shriek "Communism!" in response and pick up their assault rifles, ready to defend their God-given right to lose their home and declare bankruptcy if a member of their family should ever get cancer or be struck by some other dire illness.

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        • CountessDouche

          Was super disappointed when accidentally shooting myself with my AR-15 costed so much! No worries though, as I was able to secure 15 pre-approved credit cards...so I don't see it being a "problem." But thank the baby jeebus I didnt get my hard earned $7/hour stolen by poor people or black people...or oh my God...poor back people.

          Bill o'riely says soshlizzem is berd, mmmkay.

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          • Right, next time I see you've replied to a comment I'm gonna make sure I'm not drinking tea while I'm reading it, because laughing with tea in your mouth, yeah, not fun. XD

            How can something be so horrid (even though accurate) yet so funny at the same time?

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            • CountessDouche

              Well, there's a reason you're choking on the dirty, british leaf juice that our founding fathers tossed in the harbor! Asking for help...it makes the founding fathers cry..very Unamerican! Not impressed! Bootstraps, and all that!

              (That was my best Donald impersonation)

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        • McBean

          I agree that the USA is a great place to be rich. Of course, all the world's geniuses immigrate to the USA so that they maintain a monopoly on top-end intellectual talent. The concerning thing is that university/graduate school is becoming over-priced like American healthcare. This means the rich and powerful are shooting themselves in the foot. Taxes on poor working class people should pay to educate the most intelligent 10% of kids, or else there will be no middle managers to keep high value industry and tech running in the future. As a result, China will eventually dominate aerospace, pharmaceuticals, and production of deployable military robots.

          The future U.S. will then become a second class country governed by gun violence like Mexico. ¿Qué pasó con nuestra grandeza?

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          • CountessDouche

            You're always bragging about how rich you are. Set up a venmo for the OP

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            • McBean

              Firstly, your idea is constructive. Secondly, I agree that I am a braggart, but I'm not rich. Those rich 1%ers have at least $8M just for a start. I am a much more humble 2%er. Although I am considered upper middle class - high net worth, I live in a humble 191m^2 home with a standard jacuzzi tub and 3 bathrooms. I also drive my humble 16 year old Honda Civic, and eat a humble breakfast at a neighborhood restaurant a few days a week. So much for humility.

              What concerns me about the OP is the micro investment that lower income people must make to get by. For example, consider an electric toothbrush for $99. It will likely pay for itself quickly by avoiding dental fillings at $120 each that a manual toothbrush would not prevent. LED light bulbs give a really high payoff if used in lamps that are on all evening. Same with an $8 pill cutter from the local drug store. The list goes on, but basically anything that saves or prevents medical expenses, energy expenses, or financial service fees makes your life much better. Buying paper products, soap, cleaning supplies in bulk also gives a high return on the marginal cost of the additional quantity.

              Of course, the point here is that throwing money at any problem big or small doesn't work well. I'm also wondering what the OP does for transportation. Long ago in the early 1970s, I was a poor married college student for a year before graduation. I had a baby to feed and could not afford a car. Economic adaptation wasn't easy, but my wife and I figured it out. BTW, I'm not bragging about this. I know how poverty feels. And, I remember what we did that year to get by.

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      • raisinbran

        It's bad because we have too many 'lifestyle choice' medical problems. The money has to come from somewhere. What's your disability, btw?

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        • All of my disabilities (it's a list) come from the injuries I sustained surviving my childhood. Nerve damage, spinal damage, almost every joint is damaged and a couple need replacements, PTSD from my entire youth being a warzone, the long term affects of growing up underfed and without any medical care at all, yeah, not lifestyle choices in my case. Well, should I say, it wasn't MY lifestyle choices that caused it, and the abusive alcoholic who did can't be forced to pay for it without spending money I don't have to sue him.

          Overall I have a list of about 27 health issues, and that's grouping things together like counting all the joint damage as 1 condition. Most of them are the long term effects of what was done to me in my youth. I'm trying to fix someone else's mess that I've been forced to live with here.

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  • Thank you. I don't know what's going on on your end but, I hope you manage to find the resources you need for your own health as well. No one should have to suffer knowing there's help but that they can't get it.

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  • Just a footnote. It was a nightmare getting that question to fit into the 75 character limit while still trying to give enough info in it. Sorry if it's a bit of a mess but that was a tricky one. I will not be offended if anyone has a better suggestion about how to word this question that fits within 75 characters.

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    • CountessDouche

      Please don't apologize to the cunts. You need help & your question was succinct enough for anyone who has any type of empathy. Unfortunately, we share this website with unrepentantly selfish assholes.

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      • I'm slightly amused here. You seem like a very nice, considerate, understanding person based on what I see on this question. Then ya got a name like that for your account! This should not amuse me this much but, for some reason, it does.

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        • CountessDouche

          Hahaha...I'm truly honored to have elicited the somewhat bemused quarter smile that im picturing here. A smile is good!

          Some would say that calling other people on this site a pack of rabid cunts who are the human equivalent of a crusty, discarded pube on a public toilet seat...you know, somewhat "douchey," even royally douchey...

          but man you got some super cunty responses to this thread! Pissed me right the fuck off.

          I dont think the average person has any concept of what living with a disability or chronic pain is like. I certainly don't. You can feel sorry for people, but until you've experienced having to wake up & live you life with pain & constant obstacles, you will never get it. That's where this ignorant shit comes from.

          I have a family member with a severe disability. She suffered traumatic brain injury in a car accident, lost everything- couldn't walk, speak, memory issues, lost her house & all of her savings.

          I wish you could see her life now...she runs support groups, trains service dogs, teaches art therapy, paints (holy shit her artwork is awesome) & wrote a fucking book (I have not written a book & I got working legs & shit). She had no money for care. I have no idea how she didn't get angry & give up, but she didn't. It's a choice that I don't think I would have the strength to make, but I suppose when you are stuck in an absolutely unfair, tragic & anger inducing situation, you have to decide what to do with it. Wallow or do something else.

          I dont envy the amount of strength it will take to channel your anger into finding some type of help, but if you can find it & use the energy you would have spent cursing the universe to create something positive, there are resources out there & there are people who care.

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          • Hey, being a decent person doesn't mean being a damned saint after all. Just means you know where to direct your anger and don't mistake innocent people for targets, unlike a lotta folks these days.

            And damn, sucks that your family member went through that, but really glad to hear she's turning it around and found the help she needed. It's hard, some of us find the right resources to manage, I'm still not ready to give up on trying, trust me. Honestly, and I have told people this before, I think I keep pushing forward and fighting to try and make it because I AM so damned pissed off about the situation. Anger is a very, very powerful emotion, and I have gotten pretty good at channeling that anger into more useful and productive things. Kinda had to because my temper was becoming a little concerning at one point.

            Thankfully, my temper is no longer a problem but, really, I think it's that anger that keeps me going through the worst of it. Eh, if it works don't knock it I guess?

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            • CountessDouche

              Fuckin oath...nothing wrong with a bit of bitching.

              You shouldn't feel bad for her...fuck, she's probably happier than I am! I don't know if she found the help she needed in the traditional sense, I know she fought for it. She created her own community. Her life situation was super shitty, but she made the most beautiful, amazing life out of it. It's so inspiring to see & I say that as a person who is in the process of getting past their own self-imposed problems. She is an inspiration; a person who has built an amazing life in spite of all the challenges one could possibly face. I've had times where I've almost given up myself, and I've faced nothing, NOTHING compared to her.

              You sound like you still have so much fight in you, and that us amazing. It is inspiring. You should be fucking proud of yourself for that. You can make your anger into something good...fuck, if you find it too hard to help yourself, doing things for other people helped me when I was in my worst place. If there's no charity for people with your disability, fucking get mad & start one!

              If you ever need a friend & want to keep in touch, or want more info on my family member & her book, give me your screen name & I'll buy you IIN gold so I can message you. I'd do anything to help, even if you just need to bitch <3

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      • McBean

        Welcome back, Countess. I really look forward to your occasional visits, and of course, your top bracket intellect.

        So I was thinking that unrepentantly selfish assholes are everywhere, but unrepentantly selfish institutions are mainly in the U.S. This is why I buy prescription medication from Sheffield England. The OP could go shopping on the international market for treatments, perhaps even buying a cheap plane ticket for an appointment in the country of opportunity to save big bucks.

        Since you are an international woman of character, as well as an uninhibited thinker at large, perhaps you could provide some useful insights. Ta.

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        • CountessDouche

          not back really. I only responded to this thread cause of the uterly twatty, twatish, twatier than unwashed, reverse wedgie twat stained underpants responses to a thread from someone who actually wants help. You shouldn't advise that, as you can run into major legal trouble trying to purchase prescription medication that's reimported or illegal in the US.

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          • McBean

            If it's not a Class I restricted medication, I don't give a fuck. Healthcare institutions, Congress, and the Pharma industry as a whole is utterly twatty, twatish, twatier than unwashed reverse wedgie twat stained underpants. To which I say, "Fear not, the twats. Or society will become only all the more unwashed and twatish like the responses to this post."

            BTW, very well put, love. I like the graphic nature of your hard hitting and artful language. 8-)

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            • CountessDouche

              I still wouldn't suggest importing medication to someone who isn't prepared to do a lot of research. Importing "reimported" medication is very much illegal...for example, if you were to order meds from a Canadian pharmacy that gets their meds from say, China.

              Its probable that it would be overlooked by customs, if it's something benign, like insulin, but depending on whether said meds are ordered in bulk, the charges can be serious.

              Buying meds from overseas is definitely a cheaper option, but I wouldn't suggest it to people unless they are prepared to do research & make sure their purchases are above board.

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  • azithromycin

    Welcome to real world, ive got rare diseases too and no money for the docs or their treatments(if any exist).

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    • Oh there's no welcome needed, the real world made it clear just how much of a douche it was when I was born into the hell known as my youth.

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  • CountessDouche

    Yes! It is totally normal to be frustrated. Taking the first steps in getting help for depression is incredibly hard & being subjected to a medical system that makes you feel like nobody cares can understandably compound your feelings of hopelessness.

    I know there is ways around getting free or next to free care to help with your mental health. I haven't had time to do a ton of research, but I found this & I am totally willing to look into it more if you genuinely want help.

    https://www.healthyplace.com/other-info/mental-illness-overview/free-mental-health-services-and-how-to-find-them

    I didnt read the article in detail, but I know there are options if you get creative. For example, a lot of universities offer free supervised counseling sessions from students in training. Theres also things like free support groups & you might be able to work out a payment plan with a therapist.

    Theres other small things you can do to help your mental state, like exercise & trying to develop good sleeping habits- I know it sounds useless, but it is one of the first things a therapist might suggest before they consider medication.

    I know it seems hopeless & living somewhere where you dont feel that you can access care contributes to those feelings of hopelessness, but the fact that you are actively seeking care means that you haven't given up & help is out there if you get creative. People do care. I care.

    As far as your disability goes, I'm sure you've done the research on seeking care & I don't know if that is something you can even access. Your frustration is completely normal. I would be incredibly angry. There is no justifiable reason for you not to have access to medical care. Unfortunately, since moving is not a realistic possibility, I encourage you to get creative & see if there are any options available at all. It might be worth speaking to someone from a local support group or charity, just to explore any options you might have.

    Without more information on what type of disability you have, it's hard to find any info.

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    • OK, apparently my reply to this one never posted for some reason. . .and it was a long one. . .wtf computer?

      Alright, lets try round 2.

      I do, thankfully, have a good therapist who pretty much told me "You worry about your well being, I'll worry about medicare." Sadly I've built up a tolerance to a large chunk of the mental heath geared meds over the years so, really, we're just trying to stop it from getting worse at this point until the start of next year when weed will be legal in this state and medical users will be able to grow personal plants. Thank goodness I am sure I can manage to figure out a way to afford setting up a growing area, even if I gotta pull some scrapyard engineer tricks like I use to in order to set it up. My therapist feels that, considering how chemically sensitive I am and how quickly I build a tolerance to those meds, it's my best bet. Plus I am not about to complain about the chance to get some of these harsher medical chemicals out of my system. Much rather an herb over something with side effects that require more meds to treat those side effects and so forth.

      My health issues are mostly from my youth. my childhood was a non-stop war zone, A lot of joints, nerves, you name it got damaged repeatedly while they were in the process of growing and maturing. A still forming body doesn't form so well when parts of it are constantly damaged, dislocated and left untreated. I was also starved so was malnourished most my youth and never received medical treatment until I was an adult on my own. The only reason I was allowed to go to school was because I was born in a hospital, which meant I had a birth certificate and the government knew I existed and requires kids to go to school. But this was in the south, and I was born with two X chromosomes, so the school looked at me as property, not a person. He tried to stop my mom from going to the hospital to have me, but he took too long to get home from work. Good thing too, because I was a month premature due to him beating on her while she was pregnant. My mother once said that she wondered if she went into labor that day because of how he stomped on her the night before.

      So yeah, I'm a mess, and I didn't even do a damned thing to cause it. Not surprised I have horrid PTSD from all that as well. The long term effects, people don't realize what child abuse can really do to a person. A young, forming body that's constantly damaged will grow to be permanently damaged, and the person will suffer for the rest of their lives because people look at the little bruised up kid and go "Not my problem."

      Sorry, getting a bit worked up remembering that horse crap and my urge to cave in the heads of those types of people is rising. I think I need to take a bit to let my mind calm down some after recalling those things.

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      • CountessDouche

        It's amazing that you have access to therapy & that you're able to motivate yourself to go. After hearing your story, I dont know that I would have the strength to do that. I'm so glad you've found someone who is willing to go the extra mile to offer help.

        I was actually going to suggest snoop dog medicine, but I wasn't sure you would have access/what the laws were in your state. I had a neighbor who grew in my last ghetto apartment complex & he said the lamps/electric are what required the most financial investment, but of course he was growing illegally, so he couldn't use good old fashioned sunlight.

        I've also read that service animals are supposed to be a huge help for PTSD sufferers. There's dogs trained specifically to wake you up, comfort you & bring you back to reality when you're having an attack. I know having a full time pet is not a financially feasible option right now...but...my relative I mentioned trains service dogs (akitas - they look like giant fluffbears haha), and when they are in the process of training a dog, which starts during puppy hood, they place them temporarily (x number of hours per day) with disabled people who do not actually own the dogs, and thus aren't responsible for vet costs/food, etc. That might be worth looking into if you can access a service animal center & like animals.

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  • No treatment or medication you can get from doctors, hospitals or psychiatrist will help, yes you might find a medication that is good at masking symptoms but nothing last forever. This is a path each and everyone of us must walk alone, you need to train your own brain, no one can do it for you

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    • ^^ And this is how you identify someone who doesn't have a trace of a clue about what it's like to live with crippling disabilities nor has any understanding of how horrid medical conditions can be for some people.

      "Train your brain." Honestly, sounds like yours could use a bit of training, so please, pick up a few medical books so you actually understand how the human body and brain works before you open your mouth and make yourself look like a jerk again. Because that comment of yours makes you look like a colossal douche.

      Also, if you're one of those "Reject all proven medical science and believe they can magic all health problems away if they think hard enough." loonies, which your comment most certainly makes it look like you are, then please, do everyone a favor and stay the hell off of genuine health related questions. People die following "Advice" like what you just posted.

      And yes, I may look like a bit of an arse for this comment, but ya know what? Considering I knew someone who DIED trying to follow this kind of "mind over science" hogwash, yeah, I'm done pulling my punches with these types of people.

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      • Boojum

        Not my place to defend Stain, but I can understand the comment.

        Although you refer to "conditions", the only medical issue you specify is depression. Having read your OP a couple of times, my understanding is that your depression is a consequence of chronic pain or some other physical disabilities, but I can see how Stain (and other responders) might conclude that the root issue is depression. And I believe that cynicism and doubt about pharmaceutical and other treatments for depression is entirely justified.

        If you had said in your OP that you were dealing with cystic fibrosis, lupus, fibromyalgia, or another of the multitude of other medical conditions that are challenging to live with and very difficult and expensive to treat, then I suspect Stain's response might have been different.

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