Is it normal the doctors let my baby die.

(Sorry kinda graphic)
Iwent in with contractions at 20 weeks. The nurse spent 30 minutes testin urine and asking me dumb unnecessary questions.
"Do you have transportation, Do you live alone?" I was in pain that was growing consistently. I told her ihad a history of fast labors and that i had just felt movement before the contractions started.
She scoffed, chuckled and disappeared for another 30 minutes.

Finally a different nurse recommended a pelvic exam. But when she did it, it caused a massive contraction that wouldnt subside.

While waiting for a doctor to show up and break my water, they told me they couldnt save her because she was too young. After delivery, they just measured her, wrapped her up, and told me her heart would eventually stop.
They all just left her to die..

They told me she measured 22 weeks.

My brother in law insists that they were wrong for abandoning my baby becuz he'd had a cousin born at the same age who survived and was now a grown man.

I personally dont know what to think. They literally did nothing but check her heart every 10 minutes to see if it had stopped.
Part of me felt like more could have been done..

Is This Normal?

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 9 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • That sounds weird to me.

    My mother has been in the medical field all her adult life (Transcription, nursing, etc), so I hear stories about patients from death to birth, old to young, and the various protocols doctors and nurses must take in multiple situations. Normally, when a baby is in critical condition, premature, etc they put them in NICU. For example, my best friend was a premmy as she affectionately calls it, and was put in the NICU for a few weeks before being healthy enough to go home. For them to just give you your child, who is still alive and has a fighting chance, to just die in your arms sound so wrong to me, and I neither have children nor been pregnant.

    I'm so sorry for your loss, but you should really get a lawyer or professional to look into that.

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  • you have an emotional connection to the topic since it was your baby . This is going to make you feel biased to what happened , these are medical professionals and while its not entirely impossible for them to make mistakes or what not .. they use their best judgement and strongly consider all possibilities before making any choices . If your baby had a chance to live and they felt like it did then i am sure it would be here . Sorry to hear about your luck , take some years off and then re visit the option of a new baby . This is the vicious circle of life but there is always ( almost always ) a new chance for new life and new opportunity . Also if this helps , even if your baby was born with those circumstances surrounding it's life .. it may had had serious medical issues and died later on after suffering . I would much prefer this scenario as opposed to a human life suffering for no reason just because someone didn't want to see it have to die .

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  • I don't know how come you weren't just like give me my fucking baby?

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  • I don't know if it's normal sounds sus, but I suggest you count it as a miscarriage try again and use a different hospital

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    • Count it as a miscarriage? How insensitive. Miscarriages are when the baby dies before its birth. My child lived for 2 hours.
      You dont say something like that, even if you meant it in comfort.
      She lived. I held a living baby as it died. Treat it as a miscarriagr and try again? Grand advice! Thank you!

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      • Okay well you talked like you didn't even get to hold the cunt of a thing, ask a fucking lawyer! Then.... Or a psychologist.

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  • Any lose of a child is terrible but a premature baby is tragic my heart goes out to you but the doctors and nurses now what they are doing and would not let your child die deliberately a defective heart at the age they can't even operate on the little thing

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    • You say that but i see numerous stories of babies born way smaller than mine that arr immediately hooked up to machines and either survive healthily or die after a few days. My baby was healthy. Very developed for her age. Had all 10 fingers and all 10 toes. Had hair on her head and face and was 1 lb 2 oz and 10.5 inches long.

      Ive seen them do more for a younger less developed baby.
      While i understand your point of view, and the tragedy that is keeping a suffering child alive, they didnt even give her that chance.
      Before she was even out, before the doctor even seen her or knew her age and developement, she was deemed unworthy.

      With my last child i had to go into fetal distress before my doctor believed i was in actual labor. Not all nurses and doctors deserve the credit you give them. Maybe she just wanted to go back home and sleep instead of wasting time and effort to save mychild in the wee hours in which she was born.
      Guess ill never know tho..

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  • I'm sorry for your loss. From what you mentioned it appears that your baby had very little chance to survive. The heart failure could have killed it sooner or later.

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