Is it normal that i still care about my abusive ex?

80% Normal
4 Comments

I dated this girl for about a year and half and recently broke up with her when I found out she cheated on me. In the relationship she would emotionally manipulate me, publicly embarrass me by talking shit about me, she would scratch/punch/pull my hair when she was mad, and she would call me worthless and a piece of shit if I messed up little things like be late for the bus.

Despite all of that I wouldn't break up with her because she was extremely suicidal. The last time we broke up she downed half a bottle of painkillers and was rushed to the hospital and I got back with her because I didn't want her to do it again. The second time was a few days ago, but I took her to the hospital before she could do anything.

My question is,is it normal that I don't want her to kill herself despite all the trauma she's put me through? Or should I just leave her be for good and not worry about what happens to her?

Voting Results
80% Normal
Based on 5 votes (4 yes)
Feeling Suicidal?
We couldn't help but notice that you might be asking about things related to suicide...
If that's not the case, please ignore this message.
But, if that is the case, please, please, please call this hotline and talk to someone about it. Or, visit one of these websites and get some help.
Unfortunately IIN isn't the best place for you to be asking about this. Check out the above websites or call one of the hotlines instead. They can help. Really. We know what we're talking about. Call. Do it. Please.
Remember that everything gets better with time.
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 4 )
  • Blubber1317
    6 years ago

    That's really nice of you, but I feel like you're just with her because you're afraid of her dying, I think you should sit down and talk to her on how you feel. Explain that every time you want to leave she shouldn't do such a thing. She emotionally, physically, and mentally abuses you, that is not okay at all. If she does do anything it obvious you'd probably blame yourself, but this is a choice or decision she has to make on her own, you should recommend her to seek help or to go to a therapist. You guys can even got to couples therapy! (if you still have feelings for her, but they also help with break ups) Good luck!

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • Maybe-Not-Who-You-Thought
    6 years ago

    Think of it more in the long run. Have you spoken to anyone outside of iin? Maybe someone who knows her more personally than total strangers can tell whether or not she's suicidal because of her life or some other reason.
    My theory is that she is doing it because she wants to be needed. So I'm gonna have to guess there's someone else besides you who makes her feel like she's not. Is she close to her family? Does she have many close friends? And past bad experiences with them?
    If not, I dating this once guy who literally told me that he was alive because of me. That he would have died way before had I not started dating him...but he was still "suicidal". I no longer believe he actually was actually suicidal, because I've learned to tell the difference between depression, being suicidal and just having a problem. My ex...he just had a problem.
    I realized too late that he had family issues and issues with his past school. Had I known they would have that kind of change to him, I would've never said yes to dating him.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • Boz
    6 years ago

    Leave this girl, the pain will pass and you will find someone better..... way better

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • Nickvey
    6 years ago

    holy fucking shit dude. have you fucked her yet? if no run and never look back. get out while you are alive. if you have fucked her you might suffer from guilt if she shoots her brains out. just be sure not to be around to get the blame. like out of state.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0