Is it normal my transgender friends dislike the gender they're transitioning to?

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17 Comments

I have friends online that I video chat with sometimes. Some are transitioning.
My transmen friends seem to bash men a lot. They've said things like men are brainless, only think with their hormones/wind up with the wrong person because of this, men are smelly, bitter, disgusting, etc.
My transwomen friends seem to bash females a lot too. They say stuff like women age like sour milk, they're all golddiggers, they wear makeup because they're all ugly, etc.
I love my friends dearly, but why do they bash the gender they're transitioning to? I've asked but never got answers. Is this normal? I'm not trying to be insensitive to anyone or when I ask this.

Voting Results
39% Normal
Based on 28 votes (11 yes)
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Comments ( 17 )
  • Bad101
    5 years ago | pl

    Well when you get people who started life hating their own bodies. And rarely date each other (trans women X trans man is so fucking rare! Wtf!). Then you get self hating people lol.
    Who don't just secretly hate themselves but anyone they're jealous of. Haha

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  • MegaOof
    5 years ago

    I'm a trans man and I notice trans people bash on cis people as a whole.

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  • IrishPotato
    5 years ago

    Because, my dear compadre...

    They're fucking retarded.

    On a really serious note, they're mentally unstable and mentally ill and currently we're living in a society where people not accepting batshit crazy are considered phobic one way or another.

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  • bubsy
    5 years ago

    They're mentally unstable and society helps keep them that way. Their social circles encourage their illness, up until they off themselves anyway.

    I really hope the liberal social justice points you get are worth watching your friends screw up their hormones, go into depression and die instead of getting them the help they desperately needed.

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  • Chocobonobble
    5 years ago

    Hm sounds like to me they're not happy with themselves or probably their gender to be specific, which can lead to that "hate".

    I've even seen a trans women attack a women over a stupid argument at a bar. Arguing over outing the transwomen after the came out of the bathroom. But everyone already knew it was a transwomen, we even said that to try and descalate the fight. But it just made it worse and the women ended up with a black eye. Tried to press charges for them, but they ran off.

    I've only hung out with a trans male who's one of my female friends good friend. But he's a good guy and he passes really well (even sounds like a man) so he's not bitter at all at either gender.

    Or they're just sexist, just like anyone else can be bad no matter who they are. Even met a few girls who hate on "women" and "women things" haha.

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    • leggs91200
      5 years ago

      This statement just made things worse -

      "But everyone already knew it was a transwomen, we even said that to try and descalate the fight."

      We don't especially appreciate being reminded of our birth gender. Put it this way - it would be like telling a fat person, "I figured you would want the low calorie option since you are heavy enough as it is". Or like telling the parent of a down's syndrome kid - "I could tell your child was retarded just by looking at him".

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      • Chocobonobble
        5 years ago

        Hm I feel like the equivalent would be more like this:
        "She's not a real blond she's a brunette!"
        Or
        "She's Chinese not japanese!"
        By the way I got this from my trans male friend, I asked for his opinion.
        Still doesn't give them the right to give the small women a black eye, hopefully we can agree on that.

        I hate people reminding me about my background but I'm not going to inflict violence over it.

        Also saw your comment on that other post putting down women when it comes to rape. Your views sound very troubling...

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  • LloydAsher
    5 years ago

    I personally hate the whole transgender movement. Mainly because it’s encouraging people who have serious mental illness that need to be helped to be satisfied with their bodies as it came to them as. I don’t tell an anorexic person that they are fat because that feeds their delusion, I’m not doing this because I hate the people I want them to come to terms with it. Besides 99.3 percent of the population shouldn’t be forced to bend over backwards for the extreme minority and here them complain like it’s the CIVIL RIGHTS ERA! It’s a sickening comparison. As for the question itself they might just be distancing themselves from their former selfs out of self hatred of their former self. Quite a pity.

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  • karmasAbich
    5 years ago

    Yeck. Get new friends.

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  • Mrown
    5 years ago

    self-criticism?

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  • curious-bunny
    5 years ago

    Sounds like weird friends, I talk shit about men, and only spegic women not the gender, and im on year 2 as living as a woman soo..

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  • SwickDinging
    5 years ago

    Funnily enough I have also heard this a lot from transgender people, but I hadn't really noticed it until you mentioned it. I don't know why this is the case. There are some trans people on this site, maybe they would be able to shed some light on it.

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  • Zonfire80
    2 years ago

    I love men and I’m ftm transgender. Not in a sexual way but a bro way. And women? I do in fact like them sexually.

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  • leggs91200
    5 years ago

    Things are getting a little better for us transgender but there is still a lot things going on like "they have this serious mental illness" or whatever. Or having to look over our shoulders all the time.
    Another one is always wondering if the reason for rejection in whatever is because of our gender status.

    So there is the source of bitterness.

    I do not know why some TG would hate on the very gender they are trying to become. One reason might be because once you start living as a chosen gender, the other women (or men for FTM) often start treating you as one of them and you find out what they are really like. Oh yes, men and women are equally disgusting. Just that women try to hide it from men and men try to hide it from women.

    Now me, I am trying to figure out why everyone else even gives a shit how anyone else lives their lives.

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    • charli.m
      5 years ago

      You are literally one of the transwomen that "hate" women. You constantly make derogatory comments. You are one of the most misogynistic people on this site, and that's saying something.

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    • [Old Memory]
      5 years ago

      "...I am trying to figure out why everyone else even gives a shit how anyone else lives their lives."

      Because how they live their lives affects everyone else. Imagine middle or upper class suburbia with rows of houses. Generally the houses are wellkept and look nice when you walk/drive past. But right in the middle of a nice street is a shit ugly house all out of proportion, painted disparate colours and the garden is torn out. That house affects the market value of the whole street. The people living there think they're different and edgy but everyone else sees it for the ugly pigsty it is and wishes they'd clean house for the sake of the neighbourhood.

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      • leggs91200
        5 years ago

        The good news for those who do not agree with transgender is this -
        There just are not very many of us so more than likely you won't encounter one of us.
        But we are out there. People are just going to have to learn to live with it, just like you have to live with everything else you do not agree with.
        Just like how the straight white men are going to have to live with illegal immigrants, seeing their daughters date them as well as other races, and guess what? There is NOTHING the straight white male can do. All you can do is watch your neighborhoods turn to slums.

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