Is it normal medical professionals deny my problem

I clearly have arthritis! It runs in my family but just because im in my late 20s im too young to have it according to every medical professional ive asked! Three years ago was so bad I thought I had injured my right hand (my right hand is my worse one) but it turns out it was no fracture after xrays said so!Then last year I started sewing and after only 2 weeks I got pain in my left hand as well as a large bruise! By the time I got an appointment the bruise had faded but I showed the dr photos and he took a blood sample that was supposed to be able to show if I have rheumatism because he said I could have that instead. The blood sample showed nothing though but not surprising as I was better by then!. I dont know exactly what triggers flareups but clearly sewing is one thing! Another is ironing because it always makes my joint so stiff I cant move it, cold weather for sure as I only get proper flareups in the winter. I now have a job in a library and unfortunately it is a bit tricky! Lots of joint movements when pushing books around on shelves etc! I currently have a flareup in my right hand again been wearing a wrist brace nearly 2 weeks now. My mom gets the same symptoms during flareups and medical professionals told her the same thing for years "you dont have arthritis" until it got so bad the damage to the joints showed on regular xray image. I went to a nurse few days ago and she smirked at me, very rude!, and said "People do not get arthritis until they are 40 years old, and I used to be a GYMANST so I ACTUALLY get joint pain and you just have to deal with and there is NO cure" then she left... Very bitter hag, like its MY fault she ruined her joints by being a gymnast or something?!?!? Take your meds, Britannity. 🙄 She also said I might have rheumatism though but isnt that umbrella term which include arthritis???????? Do they know what they are saying !
I need confirmation of my arthritis!