Iin: i have these food habits when my in-laws visit

I absolutely hate my in-laws, especially the matriarch.

Whenever they visit, I blow my nose into the steak marinade and mix it good and proper. I run the sausages between my buttcheeks before throwing them on the grill. I also take a piss into the coffee and lick the plates when they aren’t looking.

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 13 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • I see why the in-laws do not like you. You have the maturity of a middle school girl.

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    • Stating that my in-laws don’t like me is an assumption, mate.

      They actually don’t have any issue at all with me. My issue with the matriarch is purely because of her endless demands.

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  • Does the SO know? I would think your looking at a divorce if she finds out.
    I taking this as you are a male because males are gross or do gross stuff more often. Are you also putting the semen in foods and drinks.

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    • Fish semen is actually something that people eat in some countries, so a few spoons of toilet water will do a better job over semen.

      And no, my SO doesn’t know. I do these things while she’s fetching her folks, so no one is around to see it. The objective of the mission is to get back at them without getting caught.

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  • Be passive agressive or outright confronational, but never fuck with people's food.

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    • Still water run deep.

      This way, the matriarch will never know that I have a problem with her, contrary to if I had been passive aggressive.

      I just smile her in her face, knowing that I had the last laugh, without her or anyone else knowing

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      • Coward. You're getting your little victory, but you're really not doing anything to hurt them. Sure, it might be disgusting, but you're setting your life up to abruptly crash if you get caught.

        Have you tried not going to their house? Talking to your SO?

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  • Ewww! Grilling the sausages is gonna kill anything they pick up when you smear them in the disgusting ecosystem that exists in your butt-crack due to your poor toilet hygiene, but adding pork fat to that reeking disaster zone is pretty disgusting.

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    • Usually I don’t wipe my butt-crack before running the sausages there. After I’m done, I take a shower and soap it real good to get it nice and clean again.

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  • You sound like a pussy

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  • You sound lovely! I can't imagine why they wouldn't like you.

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  • I do not believe you

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