Is it normal i forced myself on my roommate during a seizure?

I am a 26 year old female caregiver who lives with the 65 year old man I caregive for. Both of us are technically disabled; I have epilepsy and struggle to find a medication that fully stops the seizures. I am currently on the highest dosage of depakote they can give a person in addition to another anti convulsant. My roommate has Parkinson's and a back injury.

About a week ago I think I was too late taking my morning medication and ended up having a seizure. I cannot remember what happened afterwards so my roommate had to tell me and I had to piece it together from what I could find around the apartment. After my seizure, I removed my pajama bottoms and threw them in the trash can. I grabbed a spatula and popped one of the electric burners off the stove. However, the thing that concerns me the most is what I did next.

I walked over to my roommate and forced myself on him while bottomless and he had to fight me off. He knew I was in a post seizure state. Apparently, I kept repeating, "Don't you want me? Don't you want me?" He said he responded, "Even if I did, this way wouldn't be right."

I woke up about an hour later and started vomiting with a massive migraine that happens after I have a seizure. This behavior REALLY concerns me. If the sexes had been switched, it could have been SO much worse. It would have been a 26 year old man forcing himself on an elderly disabled woman, and the men in my family are large. I'm not necessarily a small person myself and I'm surprised (and grateful) he fought me off.

I told my roommate to ALWAYS call 911 when I have a seizure no matter what. He didn't in this instance because he was afraid of embarrassing me, but I went to the hospital anyway once I was awake and aware.

I am NOT someone who does stuff like this to people, especially crippled old men who depend on me. He took it with humor, and has been making jokes about it, but I think it's his attempt to make things less uncomfortable. I feel horrible. I essentially assaulted him and have no memory. When I finally came to, my pajama bottoms were in the trash and the burner was in the crisper drawer in the fridge. I also don't like that I was messing with the stove, due to fire...

Regardless, the I ensured that my roommate knows if I have another seizure CALL AN AMBULANCE. I don't care about embarrassment. I've been in two comas before because of this condition, I can't go without medical help.

Is It Normal?
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  • First off I’m sorry you’re both in this incredibly unfortunate situation. It is nobody’s fault that you tried to force yourself on him in this state but I do have to say that it was irresponsible of your roommate not to call you an ambulance. I find it very odd that someone with Parkinson’s would not call for medical assistance for fear of embarrassment, paramedics have seen it all before.

    Embarrassment in the aftermath of this situation is inevitable but this was the first incident and you had no way of knowing that you were going to behave that way. Don’t let yourself get lost in “could have beens”, yes it could have been worse- but it wasn’t. You cannot change what happened, all you can do is prepare for next time. Have you done any research into other people who behave this way during seizures and how they handle it?

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    • I've tried to do a little bit of research, but it's a bit difficult finding the correct wording. A lot of what comes up is about sexual activity causing seizures, or if I look up, "forcing myself on someone during a seizure" I tend to get stuff about not holding people down during one.

      The best thing I can do is take my medication like clockwork. Although at the hospital, they said I still had enough med levels in me to keep me stable, so they did not know what triggered it. However, I *did not* get my morning dosage until I got to the hospital. I think I was in the middle of trying to take it when I started having the seizure, and it was on the kitchen counter when I got home. I'm also having mild visual hallucinations, like someone moving next to me or a shadow walking in the hall when there is no one there. It started when I had this last seizure.

      I also have an appointment coming up with my neurologist on July 7. I will definitely be talking to her about it.

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      • Are there any more specialised epilepsy forums you could anonymously post your situation on? You can’t be the first person to have gone through this.

        I wish you the best in managing this and finding answers.

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  • Jesus christ that's fucked up.

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