Is it normal for your best friend, friends, and aquantences to not help you

6 Comments

What would you do if you saw me struggling to get out of a river?

This is what happened:
So I was playing capture the flag with my best friend and her friends as well. I'm 21 and a female just so you guys know.

During the game we had to cross a river to get to the others, to start a different game, because it started raining and running around in humid wet weather wasn't fun anymore.

Everyone got across the river quickly and okay, but I didn't, it took me the longest and when I tried to get up the side of the bank I almost slipped and fell back down into the river. And I told everyone I couldn't swim at the begining of the game. But no one seemed to care or pay attention to my struggle. I ended up walking along the river till I found a hard enough surface to climb on and met up with the others.

I was annoyed how no one even asked if I was okay. Even some people were more worried about another girl who's shorter and smaller than me when she was crossing the river earlier.

I don't know why no one offered to help me, and there were some pretty rude akward moments after and before this game on that day, but I have no idea why.
Do you think it has to do with my weight? I'm not fat but I am chubby but also curvy too, so I don't look very heavy since most of my fat is collected around my thighs and on my chest. I only have a little on my belly and arms.

I would have helped you up straight away 9
I would have just waited till you fall in then help you up 2
I would have ignored you like everyone else did 2
I would have help you if I see you struggling to get up 5
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Comments ( 6 )
  • ZaneT
    7 years ago

    Betrayal usually means a lack of respect. All freindships though are ultimately about balance and expectation. We are all different which makes for different levels or types of friendships. True best freinds can be rare and life takes people in new directions. There is no definitive answer to what freindship even is. You have to judge that for yourself. So you learn as you go without trying too hard, you stay positive and be true to yourself. All relationships involve a level of risk and reward, give and take. Hopefully your freindships will give both parties joy and enrichment throughout their coarse. The highs and the lows of any relationship teach us much about ourselves.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      7 years ago

      Thank you for your reasurring words.

      I've distanced my self from her a bit now, and ironically my mood has improved. So now I'm really questioning whether our friendship is actually positive.

      I'm scared to start new friendships or deepen other since I've got betrayed by another best friend a few years before. But I guess I should take another risk so I don't miss out on having a meaningfull friendship. I just hope they don't betray me again.

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  • Tealights
    7 years ago

    Don't worry about it.

    It has nothing to do with your apperance, you're beautiful. It's just the people you hang out with are probably taking your friendship for granted, as in you're fine and will always be there.

    My suggestion, talk to the person you consider your best friend, and see what she/he has to say about the river, and ask that person to be honest.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      7 years ago

      Okay thank you for your opinion.
      Since this really effects me, and makes me feel like steering away from socialisation and my friends.

      I had way more fun staying home and playing games on my own or with my sister.

      I feel like the closer I get to people the worst the relationships get. Since my best friendship I ever had ended with them becoming friends with my enemy. And even when me and my enemy made peace, she still avoids me and ignores my texts. And we go to the same uni and run into each other sometimes!

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  • ZaneT
    7 years ago

    You should not worry about these so called "friends". Understand the difference between true friends and acquaintances. True friends help and support each other, it's a two way street. If you value the friendship and it's bugging you, consider talking it out one on one. We all come in all shapes and sizes so I wouldn't worry about that aspect of your story. True friends will accept you the way you are.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      7 years ago

      Even when that friend has know you since primary school? But yeah your probably right, wasn't so long ago that one of my best friend's betrayed me and left our friendship and went with someone who hated me.

      Yeah I'll start distancing my self from them. My best friend didn't even buy me a birthday present when I did for them. Not even at my party where I took everyone to a fancy restaurant. I don't care about the gift it self but it's sad because I always get her something but she doesn't even bother to get me anything. She even brag about what she got another friend for Christmas in November.

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