Is it normal anxious about class reunion

This year it is time for a class reunion as its been 10 years. I wont go but even if I dont they will be talking about me.
I was the weird girl who never talked. I found out in adult age that I am autistic and the reason I couldnt get myself to utter a word while at school was selective mutism. The girls in my class for those 10 years were cruel and frankly sort of cult-like creepy like a group of actual sociopaths. The girls in my class would play cruel mindgames on me, each other and referred to their group as something that you needed to earn getting into by passing certain tests. They werent even pretty like mean girls are portrayed to be, fashionable sure due to rich parents, but not pretty. One was overweight and another looked like a nerdy girl with glasses and one dressed sporty like a boy but acted like she had no brain around boys and nowadays she has so much botox already that she looks uncanny. Only one of them is pretty and she was the meanest but also the most disliked one. Once they bullied her out of their group until she was depressed and forced her to earn her spot back and another time she got hurt and ended up in the hospital and the other girls were standing around talking about how they hope the stupid bitch doesnt get better so they have to see her again.
One time we got a foreign student, from Ukraine actually, and our language was for her limited. The girls welcomed her to make fun of her, they would trick her which was easy due to the language barrier and laugh in her face but she didnt get it. They became friends because she didnt realize how they were being racist and using her. They'd also frequently stand in the hallways and comment on other girls bodies in a demeaning way. One time the only pretty one out of them convinced the boys in the class to bully me by spreading a false rumour to them but eventually I told our teacher who flipped shit about it and the boys never bothered me again after that and were red with shame when our teacher called them out for having listened to what a girl told them to do. It was awesome.

I can imagine they dont want me at the reunion as my mere precense would remind them of what horrible people they are especially now that we are adults and I am fully capable of speaking up when it benefits me and I might have a lot to say.. I ran into one of the girls a while back and approached her and said hi while gluing on my fakest smile, then we talked for a bit. It was at a job we had to work together for a while. I had to do it since she wasn't, almost felt sorry for her as she seemed very lonely there too without her army of bitches. I can manage fake-niceness very well when it benefits me but that doesn't mean I feel like using it on a class reunion though it bothers me I will for sure be a topic of discussion. They always did love talking about me.

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 4 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • “would remind them of what horrible people they are especially now that we are adults”

    Don’t be so sure that they’d even think about it, if even remember at all.

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  • Just leave high school in the past. If high school is your best experience then you lead a sad life.

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  • Most of the time people like to talk about themselves and what they've accomplished & what they're doing now. If all they have to talk about is you then they are leading miserable lives that suck and they know it. Rejoice in the fact that they have nothing to be proud of.
    : )

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  • Agreed with what everyone has left here so far; people often talk about themselves more than anything (we are all the center of our own lives and focus way more on ourselves than other people), and if they do talk about you, they must not have anything good going on in their own lives and must still be mentally stuck in high school. Also, it's been long enough and so much has likely happened in their lives since then that they likely won't talk or think about it. High school is a very minor experience in a person's life (or should be, at least). In my opinion, the best comes after high school.

    Most people have grown since high school and are not the same people they were back then. If they remember it, they probably feel bad about it. It's unlikely they'll talk about that given people typically like to talk about what they've been up to instead at reunions, and I doubt anyone else there would care to listen to high school drama from 10 years ago. If they've held onto something so stupid and meaningless for that long, that is pitiful.

    If you want to go, go, but if you don't want to, don't. I went to my 5-year high school reunion 3 years ago and although I was considered a goofy kid in high school, everyone was actually really nice and it was not like it was in high school. However, if it was a bad time for you and you think you'll hate it, there's no use in digging up the past.

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