I wear a wizard hat for motivation?

I'm having a hard time staying motivated for my studies - this has negatively impacted the expected time of completion for my degree, and some of my other hobbies, such as reading and studying languages, have taken a backseat to my excessive levels of alcohol consumption. I sometimes worry if it's even worth it for me to study anything at all, because there's no guarantee, even with a STEM degree, that I'm going to get out of school with a well-paying job and not be saddled with debt.

I have thus taken to wearing a wizard hat when I study, for I find that it gives me the impression that I am not merely some student or hobbyist, but some kind of sorcerer from a faraway land, filling my head with arcane knowledge that will allow for greater manipulation of my surroundings and impressive displays of intellectual mastery. I pretend that math is some form of sorcery by which I, through the manipulation of symbols, can have an impact on the physical world should they be applied properly, and when studying languages or history, I am becoming wise in the ways of other people and other times, as any good sage should.

Many people pretend that there is some big man in the sky that they can pray to when they want help achieving some outcome, and some people think that drawing pentacles and waving crystals about will somehow result in them getting closer to whatever goal they are trying reach. I am just a slightly less delusional version of these two groups, thought perhaps even more ridiculous due to the knowledge that I am kidding myself.

Is It Normal?
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