I'm not cheating if i don't get caught. am i?

If a tree falls in a forest when no one is around, are you still a cunt? YES, yes you are.

Lets turn the table. What if your wife started having sex with another guy. If you didn't know about it (for a while) would you be mad as hell when you found out. Damn right you would be.
Now grow up and cut off this relationship before you are in divorce court. (It would come very quickly if she found out)You would find out that this "fling" is not worth it and for sure it is not affordable.

Of course it is cheating. Just like stealing is stealing and murder is murder even when you don't get caught.

Do you not understand basic concepts?

be damn sure your wife never finds out

I would say depends on what kinda sex it is. cuz some people have sex with a friend(s) for the fun of it. if its passionate sex then yes you are cheating.

Yes, it's cheating!

I sincerely hope your wife takes you for everything you have you evil ass! You knew the answer before you asked the question, you were just hoping someone would say it's okay.

I hope she has a nice life with a real man!

You're trash.

You need to tell your wife everything, she will probably want details. You need to give her every answer to every question.

Then you need to let her decide what is best for her and your son. Her future plans probably won't include you. But, that became none of your business when you stuck your dick in another woman.

Edited: spelling.

If it is just sex, ask permission from your wife. If you are lucky, she'll join you and your girlfriend. If she says no, then tell her you won't if she has sex with you so much that you don't have the energy left. And when she doesn't do that, you have your case. Say, Look, I love you. You are my best friend. I don't want to be married to anyone else. I just need sex more often than you are interested in, and I would rather have sex on the side without an emotional attachment than to break up.

What constraints will she have for you? Let her set those, then you should abide by them. My wife's rules are: 1. Don't catch anything. 2. None of her friends. 3. Don't get caught (by her friends) 4. She doesn't want to know about it. 5. If I give the girlfriend a gift, I have to give her something twice as expensive. 6. No one over 30 years old.

The only rule I've kind of broken is #4. I told her I slept with a particular celebrity that we had been talking openly about beforehand, but she doesn't believe it and I am not going to push it. She was kind of drunk one time (very rare), jumped on top of me while I was sleeping and demanded to know, "Did you really f*&^ ____?" I just laughed, then she proceeded to have her way with me.

Her reasoning is logical. She wants to feel she is secure with no chance of divorce, and she doesn't want me to embarrass her. As long as she is in the first position, and the girlfriend does not threaten that position, she is ok. I still have to have sex with her whenever she wants.

My girlfriend is 20. I'm 45+. It works great.

Well if ur being as secretive as my bf was then I wudnt underestimate your wife. Sometimes the smallest things give away the biggest secrets. Such as sudden lack of interest, random sketchy behavior like deletin the history off your phone or laptop, only using it wen her back is turned or not lettin her use it if that's how it was before. Or sudden OVERinterest (I think I made that word up) in your wife(I.e fantasizin about the other woman). For example, my spouse once wanted sex ALL of the time all day everyday out of the blue. Usually satisfied with sex once or twice a day, I thought to my self "why the sudden sex rush? Why so frisky all of a sudden" don't ask how but I found out that night he had been just talking to his ex girlfriend. JUST TALKING. Now imagine if he were cheating. Think about it.

That's from a women's perspective.

Now you put yourself in your wifes shoes. Thinkin she's comin home to a faithful man.

They say whats done in the dark will come to light. I wudnt wait until she finds out. Good luck to ya.

I hate moralistic talk but if you are waiting to be told that it is not cheating to make you feel better I think no one will do it. Don't forget all you promised when married her.
Apart from that even when you don't get married but are in a relationship of any kind people in our culture do expect the other to be faithful. That's how it works in our so called society.
If you do it who am I to tell you what so ever. I respect everyone issues as long as the other's respect mine.
If you cheat on your wife be quite sure she will never find out. Most guys become a bit careless after a wile. They are so sure about themselves, how good they are doing it that in the end she finds out.
Women suffer a lot with that and most times they like so much that in the end they forgive us or sometimes keep forgiving us. Some women they know when we go out what we are going to do and say nothing coz of how much they love us, their generosity or simply to keep a home together with the children we made together.
The issue is more complicated than we take most times when young. A soon as we see another pretty women looking at us there we go. Its a matter of ego. It looks we are less man if we don't do it.
I don't conned anyone doing it, I just think people shall be aware of all it takes in our society.
I live in Europe were to have a lover inside the marriage it looks pretty normal for him and for her. The thing is, the couple must not make questions about it. Her to him and the other way round. Like this relationships keep going and many times last longer. Sometime latter they stop having another and there they are for life.
All this cheating happens coz of the pressure some cultures do over guys getting married about 30 otherwise people might think there is something wrong with them. For what I've learned this happens a lot in USA for instance.
Here people do get married much latter and live their life till they feel they are prepared for a life together. Meanwhile they keep having a sexual relationship, many times with only one person for a long time without commitments.
Is kind of different.
Anyway I don't pretend to know all about. That's what I see around me all the time or just talking with people.
My life got quite complicated since I was very young. I had a child when I was 20 and raised him totally alone.
Now, more free to date I finally found a women like I said above. We meet several times and its very nice. A lot of respect but each one in is own place. So far it works for a wile already.
I never wanted to get married in my life. Marriage is a very serious issue. In case one is not prepared for it must not make promises he can't comply with.
I'm a guy close to 37 and I must say in most matters women are by far stronger than we are and if they expect something from you, something you promised you should think twice.
Sorry for this long post and for bad English.

If it isn't cheating, then what is it? Mutual secretive massage? Your friend couldn't afford the treatment tag so, you decided to give her a special discount?! Hahaha!

Yes its cheating you moron!

That better be some godly pussy. Cuz its gonna ruin your marriage and relationship with your son

I think you know exactly what you're doing and why it's wrong, hence why you're trying so hard to make it sound 'okay'. As though you're trying to defend yourself... to yourself.

normal...if youre a creep.

Well it sounds like your being really selfish

If a tree falls in the middle of the woods with no one around to hear it, does it still make a sound?

What an asinine question. How in denial do you have to be to ask something like that?

What are u? Ceelo Green. Its not rape if she isnt conscious