I fantasize about other girls having sex with my boyfriend
i am a woman who has been in a long term monogamous relationship with my boyfriend.i masturbate to and fantasize about having a 3 or 4some with my boyfriend and other woman,yet i am not bi-sexual or bi-curious.the thing that attracts me about these situations is that the man's penis is treated and seen as this sublime phallic symbol for the women participating.i love the thought of letting my boyfriend have sex with myself and other women,but i know i could never go through with it in reality.it would hurt me deeply and probably ruin our relationship,yet it turns me on so much.i have confessed to my boyfriend and he suggested we try it out.but when we started looking into it more,he said that we probably shouldn't because he knew it would hurt me and our relationship.i don't think its normal for a straight woman[keep in mind i would never ever be lesbian or bi]so i dont know how to deal with my dilemma. :[ please help with advice!