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is it normal that I can't spoil myself I always have certain stuff I want to buy and I have the money for it but something inside me feels like I'm struggling and shouldn't use my money.
I have a friend who buys anything she wants and I wanted something and she got it and I felt sad because I wanted it but I can't bring myself to purchase it
why am I like this is this normal
Just buy what you want if you can afford it without harming yourself and your financial plans... both saving and spending feel good. Pick whichever one makes you happiest.
Excessively “spoiling yourself” eventually leads to being broke, being frugal has its advantages. Have you struggled financially in the past leading to you feeling guilty for over-spending?
A lot of money stuff is relative.
What do you really mean when you say you could afford it? Do you have a decent emergency saving fund? Are you working towards a big goal, like repaying a student loan, saving for a house deposit etc? Would the money be better used for those things? How secure is your job?
All of these kinds of things influence whether or not you feel like you can afford something. Perhaps you are just being more sensible than your friend.
Save the majority for the future but every once in a while spoil yourself a little bit. Be secure but enjoy your life as well.