How to talk to my bf about our problems if

My bf gets annoyed sometimes when I bring up things that annoy me, and when I think we should talk about our relationships he doesn't seem to want to. How do I go about talking to him without him Getting mad or annoyed or not wanting to talk..

Is It Normal?
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  • Nobody wants to hear about what they're doing wrong or what you're unhappy with. It's pretty normal for them to get annoyed when you mention it. But you should kick them to the curb if it's to the point where they refuse to talk about it. If they really cared about what you and what you think they'd listen and try to make things work.

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  • He needs to grow up and realize ignoring important issues doesn't make them suddenly disappear. What a jerk thing to turn on you like that -_-

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  • We are that way when you show hesitation. Before you even approach him write down exactly what you want to communicate. Once you do this you may rethink it and want to add or subtract some things. Then sleep on it. Then re write or look over it again. Then put yourself in his shoes imagine how each thing could make him feel, of course it won't be perfect but try as best you can, this is a person you care about. Then imagine saying it to him, go through it in your head. Ultimately you are doing this because you care about him and want the relationship to last. If either of those aren't true, forget everything I said and break up he isn't right or you aren't ready for a relationship. Finally, and this is the most important part be direct with him using a new tone of voice. If he is used to blowing you off and you accepting that he must also believe that you didn't have anything super important to share anyways. Be direct and show him respectfully that he needs to hear you out. That doesn't mean you want to break up, it actually if done right will show him how serious you are about him that you want to make things work. This first time will be the hardest but it is important to do it right to set the tone for the future. I don't mean to overwhelm you with info but there are two more key things. Number one, is there is a 99-100% likelihood that things you bring up have never crossed his mind. Things you may endlessly repeat in your head but have never brought to his attention he may have no clue about. You need to be willing to accept that. And understand how he will react being told after the fact. The second piece is we are all blinded by being ourselves. What I mean is it for most of us is human nature to not see ourselves as the problem. I have found upon reflection I often 'see problems' in my relationships however these problems only appear when I am struggling with something completely unrelated, and then when I'm in a better place those 'problems' seem to evaporate or no longer really bother me. I know I said just two things but also its important to relax, its very serious, but you can do this without worrying or feeding into fear. Believe in yourself, and don't take no for an answer. It may mean setting a time to talk when you both have time. Do it with love, and he will thank you for it

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