Extreme anxiety and alcohol.

I'm not in that kind of rut but only because I put an enormous amount of personal effort in to escape it and I continue to work hard every single day to stay on top of things. It's very similar to living with a debilitating disease which requires daily treatment.

So firstly, you are most certainly not alone. I understand as well as anyone pretty much exactly what you are going through.

Secondly, there is a way out of this mess. It's difficult, at times insanely difficult, and no-one can do it for you. It's so much easier to just give in to it and feel better for a few hours. But each time you do that, you fall a little further down a slippery slope and make it that bit harder to escape the situation.

I wish you nothing but the best luck in the world and I hope you find a solution.

Perhaps leaving the alcohol alone will cure all your anxiety. Alcohol will not help over come whatever you dealing with, it only makes matters worse.

That sounds like me! I'm not really sure what to do about it.

My thyroid is overactive and I've been told it can actually drive you batty until you get it under control.

Maybe try havin a bloodtest done? Look up your local free clinics. They won't accept you if you have insurance though.

Oh and about the alcohol I drink once a week that way I'm in control but still get to "escape" and I have something to look forward to

mitral valve prolapse, look it up

Thank you all. Its really comforting to know others suffer from this aswell.

I apprecitate all suggestions and welcome more.

@KeyboardSolo: I think I should add that the idea of not having alcohol available to "cure" me is another thing that makes me freak out; perhaps an addition..

And I think I should also mention that sometimes I feel a buzzing in my head and my vision goes bad. Kindof like, my depth perception is impaired. Also, I see things in my peripheral like shadows or flashing lights.
Its the visual part of my anxiety that concerns me the most.

I really understand I have terrible anxiety problems too. Don't be quick to get on medication it can go either way. It can either help a lot or make you really depressed... Anyway you are not alone. I suggest you take charge of your life and work on small satisfying goals.

There are avenues for poor people to receive psychiatric care. The US government has facilities all over for this exact purpose. What they're called varies by state though, so I can't give you specifics. They'll provide services and medication for little to no cost, depending on how much you make. Your case doesn't need anything too severe. Just some benzodiazepenes and maybe some counseling. Benzos get made a big deal of because they can be used recreationally, but compared to other psych meds they're nothing. They don't mess with your head or change who you are. They just make the anxiety go bye-bye. Miracle drugs, really...