Dumb sh*t we did as kids

Idk if this counts but when I was 12-ish I wrote a 10,000+ word fanfiction and the ship was me x Jeff the Killer

I still cringe thinking about it

Me and a friend used to get old movie tickets out of the garbage bin outside the movie house. Then, when the doorman was busy, we would just show it to him and walk in. Then, after the movie we would take the ticket money to buy a Coke and half a loaf of bread. It was so good! At about 8 years of age it made sense.

- I used to think teachers lived in the school they taught at.
- I thought a turtles diet consisted of pizza after watching too much Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
- I thought hot dogs were actually made of dogs.
- I thought the portal to hell was located in the woods near my uncle Mickey's house because my cousins told me that. XD

I claimed I was on my period for the entire year that my school made us do swimming in PE. Towards the end of the year the teacher announced it to the rest of the class because she was sick of my lies. It was so embarrassing. Everyone took the piss out of me so much for months afterwards. Bitchy girls would loudly offer me tampons randomly in the hallway and in lessons as they were concerned about my constant bleeding. The memory is painful even now.

In a way I felt like it was worth it because I hated swimming and I never had to do it, but I'm still terrible at swimming now as an adult so in hindsight I probably should have just sucked it up and done the lessons.

I used to believe in the toilet monster, and so I would either flush the toilet, and run out, or just not flush, because I didn't want to wake the toilet monster.

I have reason to believe that my seven year old second cousin also fears the toilet monster, I salute him!

when I was 17 some how my poor ass stumbled across a huge windfall of money (around $18k) Thats a story all its own on how i got it. But anyway, i came back home to Washington state with it just burning a hole in my pocket, I decided to drive my shitty falling apart geo metro to Canada with all my money in cash in a zip lock bag in my pocket without insurance on my car. I get to Canada and they asked if I had more than 10k in cash to claim on the slip and i said no, They told me to pull into the check point for further questions, they told me to empty my pockets, i did and plop a bag full of 100's on the counter. Long story short they thought for sure I was slinging drugs or something, they seized the money and kept me up there for like 6 hours Until I was able to prove I got the money through legitimate means, which i did. They fined me $250 gave the rest back and sent me back to the usa side, where i again had to convince them nothing fishy was going on. eventually i was free man, but boy was i lucky i was so close to having all of seized for being a moron which would of been a huge legal battle to get it all back. actually kinda happy I didn't get through to Canada though, i mean who's to say what adventure would of happened if i had gone, But since i didn't get through i ended up going to Europe and southeast Asia which that adventure led to a huge butterfly effect of tons of other travel so I'm happy it went the way it did lol. but still what a god damn idiot i was to try and cross a international boarder with that much cash in zip lock bag in my pocket lol.

Me and my friend Andy spent a whole day one time collecting road kill and we dumped it all in a teachers driveway and inside her mailbox. She had buzzards in her yard 🤣

Me and my friend andy use to make road blocks in the middle of the night. It was so fun we'd get cones and cut off the box of a board game and would hang it over the cones. The sign said "Deer Dart Game". And people would drive up and see it and have to detour on another road. The sherrif kept coming to move it and we would move it back as soon as he left until finally he stole our cones and signs.

Shot bottlerockets out of a metal pipe at cars on a highway in the winter time. Ended up running from the police through a field and had to cross through the freezing creek to get to my motorcycle. Where me and my friend had to drive off with in the freezing cold while wet. His house was only about 3 miles away but it was BRUTAL. The cops were probably laughing.

I used to talk to pedophiles and send them photos when I was little. Yea.. I always lived super far away from them though so none actually cane and diddled me but uh yea I was definitly asking for it haha

All in one night My friends and I went camping, purchased our first pack of smokes, got my brother stoned for his first time, stole a motorbike, stole a little boat that had holes, we tried to fix the holes with windows glue/sealer, took it out in a little bay and it sunk. We trashed a small house (got busted for that one) lit a campfire that accidentally caught a headland on fire, caught a reef shark fishing and hung it in the middle of a train tunnel, almost got hit by train, train stopped and we got chased by train security... I would not change it for the world! Good times.

I couldn't be bothered commenting in detail or telling a story, ya had to be there.

"Redneck waterskiing" nailed old watershoes to two 2x4s and made a rope with a pipe as a tug line. It would of worked if the top speed of pontune boat was faster than 4mph. We almost drowned twice, still the most fun we had that week.
Also we did kayak jousting with the paddles, it was a good way to get a nasty bruise. We were dumb.

When I was about 6, I was so afraid of climbing the staircase in our residential block when it was dark. The light switch was on the 1st floor and I lived on the first floor so it didn't really help. I was afraid that someone's going to come out of the dark and kidnap me or kill me. If it was dark outside I literally was to rather piss my pants if I had to pee than come home. I don't remember why I had these thoughts in the first place. (if there weren't many people around i would just piss under the tree)

Untill the age of 8 I thought boys and girls were thee same down there.

Same age I still believed in Santa and the tooth farie

Thought every female was born with various numbers of miniature humans inside of them, which developed over time, and they eventually started birthing at like 20-25.

I came to the conclusion that being barren meant that you were born with no babies inside you. I thought of this more as a theory than a definite, absolute answer, though.

I used to hate watching movies, but loved watching the credits