Does he want to cheat on his wife?

A guy he seems to really like me(I don't live with him) posted a photo of puppies and some of his friend commented and he replied and wrote "I can't take all the puppies home because my wife will kill me".

I'm glad I never slept with him.

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  • Did he actually ask you to sleep with him?

    If not, then you are supposing something for which you have no evidence of.

    If so, then the answer is "perhaps."

    It's perhaps because he and his wife may have some kind of "open marriage" agreement.

    If such an agreement is in place and he is within the rules of the agreement, then the answer is again "no." It's not cheating if he has permission to operate within certain rules.

    If they have no such agreement or he is not operating within the rules, then the answer would be "yes."

    As an example: My wife and I have such an agreement. Every Lady I have seriously considered as a partner has seen a copy of the agreement.

    One of the terms for the most common situations is that they have the right to contact my wife in person and prior to proceeding and verify that agreement (visa-versa for anyone my wife would be interested in). Also full STD testing prior to proceeding, and consulting with each other to see if we have any objection on the character of the person (this is not a veto; but, either of us has to be able to explain why what the other person sees in that person will not be an issue).

    There are several rare situations with relaxed rules (survival situations, etc). Key here is to do your best to survive and come home in as best shape as you can someday (and people who pair up have better chances of survival). If there happens to be kids or you have a new lifelong significant other. Not a problem. We can adjust and support that (and that's all described in the written agreement).

    So what is the real situation.... or is it that you don't know.

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    • After he kissed a few times he told me never to sleep with other men. Yes he asked me on a date and then said he really wanted to spend the night with me. What's your opinion?

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      • I understand. It's likely he wanted to cheat. Your reaction is understandable. You might learn to ask some questions up front (are they married, do they have an open marriage agreement, etc); and then do some research on them (its fairly easy to find out if someone is married).

        Most people who have open marriages tell potential sex partners that up front. But, unfortunately not all.

        I don't understand the ones who don't explain that they are married with an open relationship agreement.

        It makes a much more solid relationship when the person that was in your position can agree to be in a shared relationship up front (and most Ladies who considered it have asked me to explain more details of the rules so they knew what they were agreeing too). Or alternately cut off all sexual stuff right there (although you could still be platonic friends).

        Honesty is the best way to handle this.

        I've never had difficulty finding Ladies who were willing to be my other partner.

        The difficulty has been in finding Ladies who meet my other standards of being a long term friend 1st before i even ask (I don't do short term, hook ups, flings, etc: I'm looking long term - as in many years).

        I wish you the best,

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  • Ayyyye

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