Are narcissists bad people?
Tldr: going to see mum for first time in 2 years she treats me as a child still, even after independent living question is: Can parents that infantilize children always be bad? Or does their urge for superiority fade over time?
After a lot of therapy I came to terms with the harshness of my childhood and learnt that from what I describe of my mum that she has traits of a narcissist. I was also a case of classic example of being infantilized. Some parents like her have personality disorders or some deep pain that cause them to baby their children beyond primary years.
I'm going back for the first time in 2 years because she is undergoing surgery and has no other type of family support. Usually she would use that as a way to guilt trip but this time I called family up and found out they aren't interested in taking care of her or her house while she goes in & out of surgery.
I have asked professionals their opinion but I still have my doubt. As I'm someone that became afraid of my mother by how angry she got whenever I tried being independent. I still struggle with being assertive. I'm just scared that she might get in a really bad mood and undo all the work my therapist had gone through me with to get me to be more outspoken and sure that I'm capable to being an adult.
My question is: to anyone who may have experienced the same- are parents that infantilize their children bad? Should I be worried that, even after years of living independently, that she might try to convince me to be her "bubba" again?