An ex-friend resurfaced to renew our friendship and i'm not interested

3 Comments

I met this guy through my best friend back in middle school, he had a terrible reputation, no one liked him. We thought he was quirky and had distinct weird interests like SCPs and military history and we were all about people who don't fit in, and so we invited him in our friendship circle.

As time passed we started realizing why everybody else didn't like him. He was hyper most of the time, he's delusional, he never admits he's wrong, he's extremely judgmental of people, he starts fights frequently, he's very pushy and doesn't respect boundaries, he lacks manners, he never knows when to stop joking and he thinks we're all crazy for disliking him. He even went as far as falsely accusing a teacher of sexual misconduct and spreading that rumor around.

fast-forward to 8th grade, my best friend felt pity for him (since he had no other friends) and so he stayed friends with him. I on the other hand had enough and didn't want to deal with him anymore, but i was forced to interact with him because he hung out with my best friend, so i just tried to make our direct interactions brief. And btw i did confront him on multiple occasions when it came to his behavior; yet there was no use.

When high school started he changed schools which was a great relief. That was the main reason we drifted apart, even my best friend started talking to him less.

And now I'm at the last year of high school and he reached out once again from a comment i had on a post (not this website) a few days ago saying "Hello" with a lenny face (yes a lenny face in 2019 i wish i was joking). I would confront him and straight out tell him to stay away, but he doesn't seem to be stable and he knows where i live. I've seen enough horror stories to realize it's a bad idea.

What should i do in this situation?

only reply after a second response. 1
continue to ignore him. 17
tell him you're not interested and hope you don't end up in his basement. 2
you petty teenager with your non-issues get a job. 2
other. 2
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Comments ( 3 )
  • Tealights
    4 years ago

    Ignore him. Don't block him, because if he does something crazy, you have chat logs as evidence and blocking him might set him off. Change all your settings to friends only if possible, and just never reply to him.

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  • Boojum
    4 years ago

    Quirky can be cool, but anti-social behaviour, delusions and making false allegations of sexual abuse is something very different.

    It sounds like the guy is a negative influence on anyone who comes into contact with him, so the most sensible response would be for you to continue to ignore him.

    He appears to be someone with fairly serious psychological issues, but you won't be able to cure him or make him a better person, and it's not your responsibility to even try to do that.

    At the point you now are in your life, you should be concentrating on doing well in your final year of high school and planning and preparing for what you'll do afterwards. You shouldn't allow someone like him to come back into your life and disrupt that focus.

    Unfortunately, there's no shortage of people like him - to some degree - in the world, so I think the best you can take from your experience of knowing him is that you've learned a little about how best to handle difficult people.

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  • [Old Memory]
    4 years ago

    If he's proven time and time again what a fuckwad he could be and you truly believe he's unstable and actually a threat to your well being then you'd best just steer clear. Why put yourself through all the BS again.

    If you feel for some reason you'd like to chance it and reconnect, then who knows...maybe a few years worth of high school has matured him somewhat. Of course, there's no guarantee, so...

    Just remember, it's okay to be selfish where your social life is concerned. Don't feel like you owe anything to anyone. Good luck.

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