I did not invalidate her! I said it was a good thing she got the fuck out. Please explain how that is invalidating? Also, see my above reply to Ellenna.
I completely agree with your comment that it's a good thing that she got the fuck out! What I take issue with is that you said that you think she's exaggerating. Accusing someone who is a survivor of an abusive relationship like OP of exaggerating is an invalidating thing to do.
Do you really not think that people exaggerate on Iin? You of all people should know better. I regret adding that detail of my impression of the situation, when it does not change the outcome. Why do you have to be devils advocate and pick at the details? Does it really matter if she exaggerated or not? She got out and she did the right thing regardless.
Of course there are people who exaggerate on It It Normal, but I don't think that OP was exaggerating. My question to you is why do you think she was exaggerating? What did her post say to give you the impression that she was exaggerating? What good could possibly come from you accusing her of exaggerating?
I just shared what I thought, and like I said, I regret it. I think that a lot of times people make past relationships out to be worse then they are to make them easier to forget about. And when she says things like "he saw me as completely incapable" or "he was impressed when I struggled to lift 10 lbs" I start to suspect this. Like is she to incapable to tie her shoes? And if you are over 18 and struggle to lift 10lbs, you are super extremely weak, malnourished and or have severe joint or muscle problems that need medical attention ASAP and would make it impossible to live on your own.
Okay, I'm not going to challenge her on the "he saw me as completely incapable", only because I don't know either of them so that may, or may not be true. However, on what OP's comment,"he was impressed when I struggled to lift 10 lbs", I will have to concede, and say, touché to you! You got me on that one, because I can't imagine someone being unable, or even struggling to lift 10 lbs outside of a serious medical condition. My cat weighs about 10 lbs, and I'm relatively sure that there are tiny children who can pick up a 10 lb cat.
I do want to add that I seriously think that OP needs to start working out with weights at the gym, and check out a self defense class, it certainly can't hurt.
Would all men see me that way?
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Nope, I don't think it's appropriate to invalidate OP, by suggesting that she was exaggerating.
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Doesnormalmatter
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I did not invalidate her! I said it was a good thing she got the fuck out. Please explain how that is invalidating? Also, see my above reply to Ellenna.
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RoseIsabella
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I completely agree with your comment that it's a good thing that she got the fuck out! What I take issue with is that you said that you think she's exaggerating. Accusing someone who is a survivor of an abusive relationship like OP of exaggerating is an invalidating thing to do.
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NoLifer
4 years ago
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Doesnormalmatter
4 years ago
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I notice this website does that of the thing spoken about doesn't happen in thier own life. Like you are not me you are a liar mentality.
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RoseIsabella
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I think a lot of people in general do that sort of thing.
Do you really not think that people exaggerate on Iin? You of all people should know better. I regret adding that detail of my impression of the situation, when it does not change the outcome. Why do you have to be devils advocate and pick at the details? Does it really matter if she exaggerated or not? She got out and she did the right thing regardless.
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RoseIsabella
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Of course there are people who exaggerate on It It Normal, but I don't think that OP was exaggerating. My question to you is why do you think she was exaggerating? What did her post say to give you the impression that she was exaggerating? What good could possibly come from you accusing her of exaggerating?
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Doesnormalmatter
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I just shared what I thought, and like I said, I regret it. I think that a lot of times people make past relationships out to be worse then they are to make them easier to forget about. And when she says things like "he saw me as completely incapable" or "he was impressed when I struggled to lift 10 lbs" I start to suspect this. Like is she to incapable to tie her shoes? And if you are over 18 and struggle to lift 10lbs, you are super extremely weak, malnourished and or have severe joint or muscle problems that need medical attention ASAP and would make it impossible to live on your own.
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RoseIsabella
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Okay, I'm not going to challenge her on the "he saw me as completely incapable", only because I don't know either of them so that may, or may not be true. However, on what OP's comment,"he was impressed when I struggled to lift 10 lbs", I will have to concede, and say, touché to you! You got me on that one, because I can't imagine someone being unable, or even struggling to lift 10 lbs outside of a serious medical condition. My cat weighs about 10 lbs, and I'm relatively sure that there are tiny children who can pick up a 10 lb cat.
I do want to add that I seriously think that OP needs to start working out with weights at the gym, and check out a self defense class, it certainly can't hurt.