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I am totally fine around women but when I'm around men (no matter what they look like or how old they are), I shut down completely mentally and get really self conscious and nervous. I'm just curious how many of my fellow female IINers experience this and if they do, why.
Yes and no of course!
Whether or not I'm afraid of another person regardless of sex, gender or orientation depends on a myriad of circumstances. I think a person can be too fucking creepy, if someone makes my skin crawl I need to get the fuck away from them, I don't care who they are!
Sure as a whole the average man tends to be larger and stronger than the average woman, but women are better at that codependent shit with the psychological warfare of control and manipulation. Of course not everyone fits neatly into a box and there is a certain amount of fluidity with regard to that which is traditionally masculine or feminine. Most scary ass people tend to have a combination of traits in their asshole arsenal.
I think stereotypes exist and are as such, because that's what's commonplace, however that which is commonplace is not a hard fast rule either.
I've probably cited this in past, but I have personally known and known of two people (one male, one female) who where strong, intelligent well trained police officers, one of whom was ex military, who were both victims of domestic violence. It seems like such an unlikely thing, because police officers are trained to take down criminals who are oftentimes bigger, stronger, crazier and under the influence of drugs or alcohol. One thing I noticed in both cases was that the abuser had control over the victim's mind and emotions. Chronic abuse is about more than brute force.
Try not to let fear control you, open your mind up to logic and reason then your instincts will be sharper. Under the right circumstances your fear can guide you.
Here are two books that have greatly helped me in my life:
*The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker
*The Sociopath Next Door by Martha Stout
I couldn't mark any of your suggested reasons: didn't it occur to you some of us may have experienced more than one form of abuse?
It's been hard for me as a survivor to not be afraid of all men and especially after I was raped I deliberately put a lot of energy into not hating and fearing all men for what one man did. I have quite a few male friends and also grandsons, so I couldn't really write off the entire gender. Generally though, I am wary of men I don't know well and try and keep myself safe.
No, not unless they do something to cause it. However, I will be cautious as far as what situations I get into where men are involved. It's not that I am afraid of those particular guys at that particular moment but the reality is that can change quickly and women have to be vigilant. That often means taking extra precautions or foregoing things entirely.
What you're saying makes no exact sense and it's a stupid post in general becuz both men&two men do the same exact thing whether if it's abuse,murder,drugs,etc. If you're afraid of us then you should be afraid of women as well becuz hat means you're very afraid of this world that we live in today.
No offense but you're sounding pretty stupid saying that. Don't always assume what others are or how they speak sorry but seriously don't always judge others for that. Like I said earlier whether I'm a male or female that is none of your concern. For all I know you could be a rapist or a pervert(female or male).