You really REALLY need to get to a psychotherapist! It is NOT normal and NOT good! They have many medications for people with personality disorders, they can REALLY help! Please get some counseling ASAP! I also find it interesting that this "compulsive desire" is controlable. You have wanted to kill the cat, but you haven't done it! That tells me that you can really be helped by meds and counseling! Good luck!
Wish to punish / kill animals for reasons
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You really REALLY need to get to a psychotherapist! It is NOT normal and NOT good! They have many medications for people with personality disorders, they can REALLY help! Please get some counseling ASAP! I also find it interesting that this "compulsive desire" is controlable. You have wanted to kill the cat, but you haven't done it! That tells me that you can really be helped by meds and counseling! Good luck!